Learning To Live
by Skylla1231
Summary: Full Length Continuation of Leaving. Steph deals with Rangers Death and being pregnant.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I decided to continue Leaving. I just cant get the possibilities out of my head!! lol I'm not completely sure where I will take this or how long it will last so your gonna have to bare with me.

I had wrote this chapter with out really consider how much Stephanie had accepted reality and it couldn't have come out more wrong...so I scraped it. This version fits and hopefully we can all Learn To Live :)

For my own personal purpose, Julie doesn't exist in this time period. Not sure about Morelli though.

Disclaimer: Sadly they are not mine and I'm not making any money from them.

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live**

It feels as though the sky is mourning with me, I thought sadly. The wind and rain had picked up since we started driving. Every few yards thunder crackled through in the clouds and lightning flashed across the sky.

I was in the passengers seat of the Explorer looking out the window as we drove away from the cemetery. I watch a raindrop travel its way down the tinted window, slowly increasing in size as it picked up more water, until it disappeared from my sight.

My right hand was absentmindedly tracing circles over my stomach, while I thought of how I was going to tell three of my friends that I was pregnant by the man we just buried.

Admitting it to myself and saying it out loud were two different things.

Take a deep breathe, Steph. You can do this. They'll help you. They're your friends. They love you and will help you in any way they can.

"Stephanie, are you ok?" I jumped at the sound of Tanks voice. No one had said a word since we left. His voice couldn't have been louder than a whisper but I want expecting it either.

_Whisper. Babe. _

Oh God. I felt the tears gathering again. A big, hot, tear trailed down my face. Followed by another. And another. And another.

Angry at myself, I frantically wiped them away. No. Stop it. No more crying. I need to be strong now. I need to make Ranger proud. I need to make our son proud.

"Beautiful?" Lester asked from the backseat.

I opened my mouth to tell them but no words came out. Clearing my throat, I tried again. "I...," my voice was hoarse from crying so much, "I need to tell you guys something."

"You know you can tell us anything, Angel," Bobby, who was sitting in the back with Lester, spoke for the first time, soothing me with his voice. "What is it?"

"I don't really know how to say this, so I'm just going to come right out and say it." Taking a deep breath I told them, "I'm...I'm pregnant."

Silence.

Pure, uninterrupted silence. Not even the storm was making noise The thunder stopped. The rain turned into a light drizzle. The wind slowed.

"Guys, please." I half whispered, half begged. "Please say something. Anything. Yell at me, congratulate me. I don't care. Just please same _something_."

Still nothing. No one spoke. No one moved. It was as if time stood still.

By this time we were pulling into the Rangeman garage. Tank parked in the nearest spot. He didn't even bother to shut off the engine, before he was out the door and opening my door.

His voice was terse when he spoke. "Are you sure Stephanie?" He gripped my shoulders almost painfully hard. "Are you sure?"

I was unable to speak because fear surrounded me from the look in Tanks eyes. I couldn't name it. It was too intense to identify.

When I didn't answer he gave me a little shake. This time when he spoke, his voice was gentler, probing. "Are you sure, Stephanie?"

Now he looked...almost pleading. Pleading for what I was unsure. Did he want me to be pregnant? Or did he wish I wasn't pregnant?

Still unable to speak, but understanding the importance of my answer, I nodded my head.

The next thing I knew I was out of the car suspended in the air. Looking down at Tanks face below me, I saw relief, joy, and ... love. So much love was shining in his eyes.

"I knew that son of a bitch would leave us like that," Tank said as we brought me down into his arms and hugged me.

"I knew it. I just knew it." I don't know how many times he repeated those words but they brought me comfort. He already loved the little miracle inside me as much as he loved Ranger, his brother in almost every sense of the word.

I wound my shaky arms around his neck and pulled my lips close to his ears. "Its a boy Tank. I can feel its a boy."

When I pulled back to see his face, what I saw will stay with me for the rest of my life. Tears were streaming from his eyes.

The concern I felt must have shown on my face because Tank started laughing and said, "These are tears of joy Bombshell. I couldn't be any happier right now." He pulled my head back down on his shoulder and said quietly, "You don't know what this is going to mean to all the guys. Losing Ran...losing Ranger put a huge whole in all of our hearts. The biggest was in yours though. We are all still hurting but this baby, this amazing baby boy, is going to change all that. He will fill our hearts and make them whole again. You wait and see Stephanie. We'll be ok now. You'll be ok. I promise with everything I am, I will take care of you and this baby."

That had to have been the longest speech Tanks had ever said to me. And the most beautiful too. Tears flowed unchecked from my eyes. This time though, just like Tanks, they were tears of joy.

"I will too. We all will," Lester said.

Surprised I looked up and saw what had to have been all of the Merry Men standing around the parking garage, looking at me with love and affection.

A chorus of "Yeahs", "Always", "You can count on us", and "Definitely"flowed out to me.

"Come on Tank. You had your turn. Give the rest of us ours." I'm not sure who said this, Binkie maybe?

"Tank always did suck at sharing." That definitely came from Hal.

Tank started laughing along with everyone else and soon I started laughing too. I don't even remember the last time I laughed.

Gently Tank put me back on my own feet, but no sooner had my feet touched the ground, I was swept into Lester's arms. "I can always count on you to turn a bad day good Beautiful." He smiled at me, but it was quickly replaced by a serious expressions. "I meant it Stephanie. I'll be here whenever you need help. You and Ranger have done so much for me. Its about time I start to pay you back."

Confused I asked, "Ranger I get, but what I done for you?"

Pulling me back into his arms with my head underneath his chin, he whispered "Everything, Beautiful. You've done everything."

I didn't have time to think about that because Lester gave me a quick kiss on the cheek and passed me off to Bobby.

"Congratulations, Angel."

I sighed. "Thank you Bobby, but you know I'm no Angel. How many times do I need to tell you that?"

"Your wrong, Steph. You just proved you are an Angel," he said as he placed a hand on my still flat stomach.

Next was Cal, and so on, and so on, and so on, until I was hugged and congratulated by all the Merry Men.

My co-workers. My friends. My family.

"Now that you told us, its time to tell your family and Rangers family." Lester said with an sly smile on his face.

Everyone broke out into laughing fits from the look on my face.

My tormentors, I added to myself.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Ok. Here we go. Learning to Live Chapter 2. Not much happens plot wise, but I felt this was necessary in order to lay out what's to come. I promise chapter 3 is going to surprise you :-)

All Spanish words from Google, so they are probably not 100 accurate. If you have the correct phrases, please feel free to tell me and I'll fix them.

As Always Thanks For Reading,  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live  
****  
****Chapter Two**

"Is this necessary? Is this _really_ necessary?" I asked.

We were all in a typical Rangeman Explorer heading to Ranger's parents house. By we, I mean Tank, Lester, Bobby and I. Without even consulting me, they loaded me into the car and started driving.

"I mean I know I have to tell them some time but cant I wait after the ultrasound, I think that what its called. Right, Bobby? Your a medic. You should know these things. I mean wouldn't they want proof? Did you ever think of that? What if they don't believe me? What if they don't want to believe me? In that case I'll have the ultrasound. Ta Da! Proof! See, it makes sense. Proof. We need proof!"

Nothing. I wasn't even sure they were breathing at this point. I know I was babbling, but still! Jeez.

"Why are you guys ignoring me? Say something already!"

I swear Tank sighed. Tank _never_ sighed.

"Beautiful, you have to tell them sooner or later. The sooner the better. They're hurting as much as we are, including you. They need to know." Lester's voice was gentle but firm.

"I know Lester. I know. But its late and I don't think I can do this yet. I'm not ready. Please. I cant face them. Not...not today." By the end, my voice started cracking.

Tears once again filled my eyes. Taking a deep breath, I blink them back. Most of them anyways, the rest I quickly wiped with the back of my sleeve.

"Soon," Tank demanded. "No longer than a week. They deserve to know. They need to know."

"Soon," I promised.

"There is something else we need to talk about, Angel." Bobby said.

By the tone of his voice I could tell I wasn't going to like where this was going. "What would that be?" I asked slowly, cautiously.

Tank continued for Bobby. Stupid ESP. "Your work and living arrangements."

Oh God! I hadn't even thought about those yet. I cant keep bounty hunting while I'm pregnant! What if something happens? When, I corrected myself. What would I do then? It would only be a matter of time with my luck. And my apartment! It's as much of a magnet for trouble as I am. Plus theres no room! How could I raise a baby there? How could I raise a baby without a job? Without a home? Oh God! I'm a bad mom! My child's not even born and I'm already screwing up. I cant do this. I cant do this!

"Stephanie! God damn it Stephanie, relax! Its going to be ok." Lester? Whats he saying?

It was then that I noticed the car had stopped and my door was open. Lester was holding my hands. His concern was palpable

Whats the matter, I tried to ask. No words came out though. I'm not even sure if my mouth opened. His lips started moving again so I focused on listen to him. "...thats it, Beautiful. Focus on me. Breathe with me. In and out. In and out. Good job. Keep on breathing."

Why was my breathing so ragged? What just happened? And why is my heart pounding so freaking fast? What was happening to me? I was starting to scare myself.

"Fuck." Lester cupped my face with his hands, making me focus on him again. "Stephanie! Stay with me here! Breathe. In and Out. In and Out. Don't think about anything else. Just focus on me. In and Out. There you go, Beautiful. Thats it. Your doing good. In and Out."

He kept repeating everything over and over again. Slowly, it could have been minutes or it could have been hours, my breathing steadied and my heartbeat returned to normal.

"What happened," I whispered.

Lester's hands dropped from my face, and once again held my hands slowly runny circles around them with his thumbs. The movement relaxed me slightly. "It seems like you had a panic attack there, Beautiful. All of a sudden you started gripping the arm rests like your life depended on it and your breathing went crazy. Tank had to pull over. You started to turn purple because you weren't getting enough oxygen." His voice dropped below a whisper. "You scared me, Beautiful."

"You scared all of us," Tank corrected.

Surprised, I turned my head and saw Tank and Bobby with the same concerned look Lester had.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. "I-I don't know what happened." I hadn't realized I started crying again until Lester took his right thumb and gently wiped them away.

"Its ok, Angel. Your alright now. Do you remember the last thing you heard, or thought?" Bobby asked already in doctor mode.

"I don't..." I paused.

"Take your time, Angel. Relax. It'll come back, just take your time."

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. Bits and pieces started to come back to me.

"You...you said we need to talk about something." I opened my eyes and looked at Bobby. He gave me a small smile and nodded for me to continue. "When I asked what, Tank started talking about my job...and my apartment."

"Good, Stephanie. Your doing great. Now do you remember what you were thinking after Tank had spoken?"

I closed my eyes, and leaned my head against the chair, wishing that I didn't remember. Seeing me nod my head, Bobby continued, "Ok. Good. What were you thinking Steph?"

When I didn't say anything Lester squeezed my hands tighter til I opened my eyes and looked at him. I felt bad that I was causing the worry on his face. "Let us help you. We cant help you unless you tell us whats wrong, Beautiful."

"I'm a bad mom." My voice sounded like a frog, I thought grimly. Silently, after Lester released one of my hands, Tank handed me an open bottle of water. I took a few small sips, handed it back to Tank and placed my hand back in Lester's. I need the contact. Lester squeezed my hands as I continued. "I cant keep my job as a bounty hunter. I cant risk anything happening to this baby. And my apartment is a death trap. I cant live there anymore. So now I have no job and no where to live. How can I raise a baby with no job and no where to call home? See? I'm a bad mom."

"Beautiful..."

"Angel..."

"Bombshell..."

"No. Don't make excuses for me. I'm a bad mom and I haven't even done anything yet! Imagine what I'll be like when he's born! He'll hate me!" While I talked, more and more tears started falling and soon I was full out crying. Lester lifted me out of the seat, sat down himself, and cradled me into his arms.

"Shhh. Shhh. Por favor, deje de llorar, hermoso. Todo será bien. No se preocupe. Todo será bien, te lo prometo. Te lo prometo,"1 he whispered into my ear. I don't know what he said but my sobbing quieted to the occasional hiccup and my tears dried out.

"I want to be a good mom. I don't want him to hate me, Lester." I whispered when I found my voice. Looking into his, Bobby's and Tanks eyes I saw disbelief, but mostly support.

"You will be the most amazing mom, Stephanie. Don't ever doubt that. Your not that far along. And not to mention what's happened. Of course you haven't considered that stuff. That doesn't make you a bad mom. Other things have been on your mind. And he could never hate you. No one could hate you. Not even if they tried." His voice dropped at the last sentence, making it hard to hear, almost as if he hadn't meant to say it out loud.

"He's right, Angel. Its ok. You haven't done anything wrong."

"You just accepted your pregnancy and told us about it. You didn't have time to plan anything yet. Don't worry though," Tank patted my knee, "thats what we are here for. I told you back in the garage that we'll always be there for you and this baby boy. We meant it."

My head and eyes started to feel heavy so I leaned my head back on Lester's shoulder and closed my eyes. "Thank you. All of you. I don't know how I'd get through this without you."

"You'll never have to find out, Angel."

Lester spoke again, "Its been a long day, Beautiful. What do you say we get you into bed. You and the baby need a good rest."

"Mmk," I mumbled into his chest. Car doors closing and an engine starting was the last thing I heard before I fell asleep.

The next thing I knew, I was being carried but I still didn't open my eyes. Huh. Guess were here. Wherever here was. I heard elevator doors open and a second later close. A few momentss passed before they once again slid open. Room doors opened and closed as we moved through an apartment. I was gently placed on my side on a soft, comfortable bed. Someone took my shoes off. My jacket, hair clip, and jewelry followed quickly. Covers were pulled over me tucking me in.

"Goodnight." I felt a kiss at my temple.

"No," I half whined, half begged. "Stay with me. I don't want to wake up alone. Not today," I said sleepily.

Mumbled voices carried out to me, but I couldn't understand what they said or who they were.

Just when I thought I was going to have to ask again, I felt the covers lift and a warm body slid in next to me, pulling me against itself.

"Sleep." The warm body gently demanded.

No sooner had the word left his mouth, I succumbed to the darkness.

* * *

1Please stop crying, Beautiful. It will be ok. Don't worry. It will be ok, I promise. I promise."

TBC

Chapter 3: Stephanie goes to the doctors and find out something finds out that...


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This chapter took longer than I originally thought to write so I decided to forgo Stephanie's ob/gyn visit, at least until the next chapter. Hopefully you guys like it anyways. :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

**Learning To Live  
****  
****Chapter Three**

"_I don't want to go back," I whispered._

I was sitting in between a pair of muscular legs. Strong arms were wrapped around my stomach running soothing circles around my sides.

"I know, but you have to." He whispered back.

The waves gently lapped at the sand beneath our feet. The sun just began to rise marking the start of a new day. Rays of red, yellow, orange, purple and blue brightened the sky and reflected across the vast ocean.

"I miss this. Watching the sunrise. It hurts too much to watch it alone."

"You're never alone. I'm always here. The guys are always here."

"Will I come back here again?" I asked changing the subject.

"I don't know if thats such a good idea."

Not wanting to continue talking, I just nodded my head.

Closing my eyes I memorized every second. The sound of the waves coming ashore. The way the wind blew across my tear-tracked face. The feel of his arms anchoring me to his broad chest. The way his dark, long hair fanned out and tickled my shoulders. The way his lips grazed my ear. I didn't know if Id ever come here again so I took in every detail.

Never wanting to go...Never wanting to forget.

"Its time." His voice shook slightly.

"Just a little longer. Please." I begged as tears flowed freely from my eyes. "Please." I said again when he didn't answer.

Unable to say no he nodded his head. "Just another minute. Just one more minute."

Moving as if I would break at any second, slowly he laid me down on my side and tucked my body back against his.

"Close your eyes."

"No." I shook my head. "You'll leave as soon as my eyes close."

"I'll never leave you. I promise. I'll aways be here in your heart. Its time Stephanie. Close your eyes."

Again I should my head no.

"Te amo. I love you. Never forget that. Te amo, Babe." His tears mingled with mine as he laid his cheek against mine.

"I love you, Ranger. Never forget that." I repeated back to him, as my eyelids became heavy and closed on their own.

"Prometo que todo estará bien. Siempre voy a estar aquí para usted, prometo. Prometo."

_

* * *

_

"Prometo que todo estará bien. Siempre voy a estar aquí para usted, prometo. Prometo,"1 a familiar voice repeated.

"Stop." My quiet voice hardly carried to my own ears. "Stop saying that. Just stop." I said louder. I squeezed my eyes tighter, willing the tears to go away.

He stopped but didn't move. Neither of us moved.

His arm held fast around my stomach. His cheek continued to rested against mine. Everything was so eerily similar, yet it couldn't have been more different.

Seconds, minutes, hours, who knows how long had passed before either of us spoke.

"Bobby got you an appointment with an ob/gyn today. Her name is Dr. Covey. Shes the best of the best."

When I didn't say anything he continued, "Its at 6:00 pm. Her office is about an hour away from here. Close to Newark, I think."

I simply nodded and we lapsed back into silence.

He didn't know, I reminded myself. How could he know? You were dreaming. How could he possibly now what was said in a dream? Don't take it out on him. Don't ignore him.

"I," I started and stopped. I cleared my throat and tried again, "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. I should have let you sleep. I know what your like when you don't get your beauty sleep. Scary." His fake shiver brought a tiny laugh out of me.

"Your an ass. You know that."

"Yea but I'm a cute ass and you still love me. You said so yesterday." I felt him smile.

"I said I loved all of you," I corrected him, playfully elbowing him in the ribs.

"Ouch," he rubbed his 'hurt' chest. "Its ok. I know you love me the most. How could you not when you have people like Tank and Bobby around?"

"What about me and Bobby?" Tank's voice startled me from the doorway.

My eyes finally opened, only to close a second later.

"Ugh. Too bright." I groaned.

I heard movement through the room, and a second later what sounded like blinds snapped close.

"That better, Bombshell?" Tank asked, his voice sounding amused.

Cautiously I opened my left eye a crack and deemed the room dark enough. Both of my eyes popped open when I took in my surroundings.

"Where am I?" I asked, turning my head to take everything in.

I was in a huge, four post, cast iron bed, with dark brown sheets embroidered with a light green pattern of different shapes. The green perfectly matched Lester's eyes which were watching me access the room.

"Its my apartment at Rangeman." Lester said with a proud smile which quickly faded as he continued. "We though it was best if you stayed on the 4th floor."

Ignoring the last part I continued to survey the room.

It was very spacious and had a total of two large cherry dressers, matching side tables, and a floor to ceiling mirror was placed directly in front of the bed. Cant really say that surprised me.

In the left front corner was a set of double doors which I assumed led to the closet. The open right corner door revealed the living room, while the stark white room behind me was clearly the bathroom.

"I thought the apartments were smaller than this."

"They are, Beautiful. Most of them anyways. Me, Tank and Bobby have different layouts and more room because we're shareholders."

"Which is the reason I came up here," Tank interrupted "We have a meeting downstairs in one hour. I figured that will give you enough time to get ready."

"Thanks. What time is it? What's it about?"

"Its 9:00 am, and I think its best," he started off slowly, "that you wait til you get there to find out."

"No," Lester looked mad. "tell her, now. She needs to prepare herself. We cant just surprise her with something like this."

"She wont go if we tell her." Tank argued back.

"She will go. She just needs to be prepared." Lester sat up, and stared at Tank.

"Ok, you two are starting to scare me. Whats going on? What's this meeting about?" Following Lester's lead I quickly sat up. Bad idea, I thought to late as a powerful wave of nausea flowed through me. I had just enough time to run through the open bathroom door and to the toilet before I began to throw up. There wasn't much in my stomach but that didn't stop the dry heaving.

Lester came in moments after me and held my hair away from my face with one hand and gently rubbed my back with the other.

A few minuted passed and my throat became raw and my head started to pound.

"Shh. Shh. Its ok, Beautiful," He said quietly when he saw the tears. "It'll pass soon. I promise. Shh. Shh."

When I was done, I closed the lid and laid my head on it. I heard, as much as I felt, the toilet flush. I was lifted from the floor and placed on a counter near the sink.

Lester then let go, turned around, reached into an alcove and pulled out a new toothbrush and some toothpaste. Tank, who just entered the room, handed me a bottle of water.

"Are you ok?" Lester asked quietly. When I just nodded he said "How about you take a nice, hot shower? We'll be right out side in the living room if you need us. There are some clothes and girlie stuff Ella picked up, under the counter your on. Take your time, Beautiful. The meeting can wait."

Before I remembered to ask what the meeting was about, both Tank and Lester left the bathroom, closing the door behind them.

**

* * *

  
**Forty-Five minutes later, I walked into the living room. I had on a simple black pin-stripe suit, and a pair black Mary Jane's.

Half way into the room I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw Lester, Tank, and Bobby. They all had on black slacks and silk shirts. Bobby had on a dark chocolate shirt, which complimented his skin tone, Tank was wearing a maroon type of red, and Lester's was a dark shade of green.

"Stop staring, Beautiful. Your giving me a complex." Lester said when he caught my eye.

Completely ignoring Lester, Bobby pointed to a silver serving tray sitting on the coffee table. It had an assortment of crackers and a cup of chamomile tea. "You should really eat and drink something. It will help keep the nausea down. In the mornings sit up slowly, too. Moving too fast will make it worse."

"Thanks for the advice, Bobby."

I sat down on the leather sofa and picked at a few of the crackers.

When Tank saw that I was settled, he started talking. "Lester talked me into telling you about the meeting, Bombshell. I'm sorry I wasn't going to tell you. I just thought you would take it better if you found out down there."

"Its ok, Tank. Just please tell me whats going on."

Lester and Bobby sat on each side of me as Tank continued. "There are a few people downstairs. Most of them have..._had_...a business relationship with Ranger."

Oh God. I cant even hear his name without a piece of my heart breaking.

"I...I don't understand."

Taking my chin in his hand, Lester guided my face up so I could see his eyes.

"Beautiful...Stephanie... Rangers will is going to be read."

No! No! No! Not now!

"No-o!! I-I cant d-do t-this. N-not yet-t" I stuttered and started to sit up but Lester, very gently, held me down.

"Yes. You. Can. Its going to be hard for all of us. We need you there though, Stephanie. You're a part of the will. A big part. It cant be read without you there. Ranger made two separate wills: a personal one and a business one. His family was read the personal one a couple days ago. This one has Rangeman in it."

"What do I have to do with Rangeman?" I whispered, not really wanting to know the answer.

Lester stood up and put his hand out to me. "There is only one way to find out."

When I hesitated, he grabbed both of my hand and pulled me up slowly tucking me into his chest. Lowering his voice he said, "I know it hurts. I know this is going to make it worse, too. But I also know you can do this. Your stronger than you give yourself credit for. If you wont do this for yourself. Do it for me."

I nodded my head slightly. "Ok"

It was like I was in a trance as we walked up to the conference room where the will was going to be read. It wasn't until we actually stopped that I realized we were in front of a door. The Door.

Bobby walked in front of us and pushed the door open. "After you Angel."

Knowing I couldn't not do this, I took a deep breath and tentatively stepped forward into the door way.

I felt a hand on the small of my back, gently but firmly, guiding me further into the room.

As soon as I stepped in, I was approached by a strange man. He was good looking in an understated way. Caucasian, short brown hair, brandy colored eyes, and muscular. Not Merry Men muscular, but the type where you you spend a few days in the gym to keep it up. He had a simple pair of rimless glasses hanging from his shapely nose.

"Ms. Plum, I presume? I am Daniel Beaton, Rangeman's legal advisor and council." he said with a sad smile as he shook my hand. As soon as he let my hand go, strangely I felt like washing my hands.

"Please call me, Steph," I responded almost automatically.

"Then call me Dan. I have to say I've been wanting to meet you for quite a long time. I just wish it was on better circumstances. Ric talked about nothing but you for several years. He loved you very much. I'm terrible sorry for your loss."

"Thank you." I was hoping no one noticed the way my voice cracked.

"Can we start already? The sooner this is over the better for us all." Tank said as he led me to a seat.

When I was seated I had he chance to look around the room. Not there was anything to look at really. Plain white walls, large glass conference table, 10 solid black chairs, what seemed to be a projector in the middle of the table, a simple black and white clock was placed above the door, and a small glass table was off in one of the corners.

"Of course, of course. That would be best for everyone." Dan said. He walked up to the front of the table, that would have been Rangers seat I thought sadly, and started to pull papers out of the briefcase that was sitting there. From my view point I could also see a large box that was below the briefcase, underneath the table.

Three nameless faces were sitting opposite of me, Tank, Bobby, and Lester. Two were men, and the other, of course, was a woman.

"Lets begin, shall we." Dan started speaking again.

I didn't really want to know he was saying so I tuned everything out. I emptied my mind. I couldn't feel anything thing if I didn't think. I imagined a white room, kinda like the conference room, only this one was completely empty. There wasn't even a door. I stayed there, not thinking, not feeling, until I felt a hand squeeze my left knee. I looked over and Lester caught my eye, slightly nodding his head towards Dan, telling me to pay attention.

When he squeezed it again, I relented and focused on what he was saying.

"The last person mentioned is Ms. Stephanie Plum." He looked at me with a weird smile on his face. "In the even of Mr. Manoso's death all 51 shares of Rangeman LLC owned by Mr. Manoso, are hereby awarded to Ms. Plum. One quarter of all stocks and bonds, totaling to over 27.5 million dollars, are also awarded to Ms. Plum. There also seems to be an undisclosed location of a house that is to be put in Ms. Plums name."

Reaching down under the table he pulled out the large box. Opening it, he proceeded to pull out smaller closed boxes. Everyone in the room was handed a box with their name on it. "These boxes," Dan had continued, "were prepared by Mr. Manoso and kept closed and under lock and key. They are for you to open when ever you like. I will be contacting you all personally at a later date to finalize Mr. Manoso's wishes." He closed his briefcase, signaling the end of the meeting.

The three people across from me had slightly peeved expressions as they grabbed their boxes and left the room with out a backwards glance.

"Ms. Plum, I wish I could chat with you over coffee or something but I'm afraid I have another meeting to attend with my associates. It was a pleasure meeting you. Hopefully I'll see you around sometime. Yes?" Dan had taken my hand and planted a wet kiss on it. No sooner had my hand fallen back to my side, he was out the door.

"Are you ok, Angel? I know this is a big pill to swallow."

"Fifty-one shares, Bobby. Fifty-one shares." I was in awe. I was scared. I thought I was to throw up. "I own Rangeman Trenton."

"Not quite, Beautiful."

"I think I know simple math Lester."

He gave me a small smile. "Yes you do. But your not looking at the whole picture. Your only seeing whats in front of you."

Tank took pity on me and spelled it out for me. "Steph, Dan didn't say Rangeman Trenton. He said Rangeman LLC."

"Whats the..." And then it hit me like a tidal wave. "Oh My God! No. Absolutely not!" I stood up and placed my hands flat on the table trying to fight the dizziness and nausea. "No way! I don't even know how to run Trenton, and Ranger left me in charge of three other Rangeman's as well!! No. Absolutely Not! You guys can split my shares! I am not, I repeat, I am NOT going to run Ranger's businesses into the ground." Towards the end I started to sway a little.

"Stephanie!" Bobby yelled. I think it was a yell. I couldn't really tell. It seemed as though my ears and eyes were closing into little pinpoints and every second they got smaller and smaller.

My knees buckled but someone caught me before I hit the floor.

"Stay with me, Beautiful. Stay with me!"

Lester's worried voice was the last thing I heard before I fainted.

**

* * *

  
**1I promise that everything will be fine. I will always be here for you, I promise. I promise.

TBC

Chapter 4: Stephanie really does go to the doctors and finds out some startling possibilities...The question is: Are they good? Or are they bad?


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer...I keep forgetting this part...All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Dr. Covey, Daniel Beaton, and characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Sorry for the wait but here it is. Finally Stephanie sees Dr. Covey, her ob/gyn. I had to do quite a bit of research for this chapter since I don't have the slightest idea as to what women go through in these visits. Please feel free to correct anything if you feel the information is not accurate.

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live:**

Chapter 4

Who turned off all the lights, was my first thought.

What the hell, was my second thought when I remembered I had fainted.

Fuck, was my third thought when I remembered _why_ I fainted.

Fifty-one shares of Rangeman LLC, twenty-seven and a half million dollars, and a house. All of it was mine, and I had no idea what the hell I was going to do with it. I didn't even _want_ it.

I hate this. I hate this. I hate this.

And then thats when I heard it.

_Beep... Beep... Beep...  
_  
There was only one thing that could make that ridiculous sound. A heart rate machine. I was in a hospital.

Shit.

I must have made some kind of sound because I heard someone call my name. "Stephanie?" It was a soft, kind voice. It wasn't one of the Merry Men. I think it was...female?

"Mmm," was the only thing I could manage.

"Stephanie, I need you to open your eyes. Can you do that for me?"

Open my eyes? Why didn't I think of that? I tried but nothing happened.

I felt someone hold my hand and give it a gentle squeeze "Come on, Beautiful." Lester. "Open your eyes."

I attempted to say I'm trying, but I think it came out more like "M tyein."

The chuckle that followed proved my theory.

Did you know you can still give 'the eye' when your eyes are closed? Bet you didn't. I also bet you know how well that went over too. I heard two other voices laughing at me. Stupid Merry Men. "Nu laufin at me."

And thats when they started full out laughing. Bastards.

Now I had to open my eyes. Come on Stephanie. Open your eyes so you can kick their stupid, dumb, male asses.

I managed to crack my eyes open a bit. Bad idea. "Ughh." The light felt like it was tearing my eye apart from the inside out.

Lester quickly stopped laughing, and squeezed my hand tighter. "You ok, Beautiful? Whats the matter? Are you in pain?"

I lifted my free hand up to shield my eyes as I opened them again, slowly and carefully.

Huh. Not what I what I was expecting. Instead of the plain white walls I was used to, these walls were light blue with fluffy white clouds painted every where. There was still all the standard medical equipment, more actually, that gave it the look of a hospital room, but the atmosphere was definitely lighter.

Focusing back on Lester, I said, "Yea I am in pain." Guess my voice is back. Lester looked alarmed. I almost felt bad. Almost. "It hurts to lie down like this cause you guys are such a pain in my ass."

Bobby and Tank started laughing again, but Lester's blank look slammed into place. "That not funny."

I looked over in Tank's direction by the foot of my bed. He was still laughing. "Tell him that."

Lester let go of my hand and walked out of the room. Dimly I head a door open and slam shut a second later.

Jeez. It was just a joke.

"Whats the matter with him?" I asked Tank, as I cautiously removed my hand from my eyes.

Bobby, who was standing by my head, answered for him. "I though I was going to have to admit him in the hospital when we brought you here. He looked like he was about to have a heart attack. Angel, you really do need to stop doing this to us. You scared us all, when you wouldn't wake up."

"Sorry." I said genuinely. "How long was I out for?"

"Almost five hours," a feminine voice said from behind Bobby. Bobby graciously stepped out of the way to reveal a beautiful woman. She was tanned, not that stupid tan-in-a-can type either, around my height, had shiny blonde hair that anyone would kill for, and a shapely face and looked to be in her late 30's or early 40's. She could easily be a model.

Everyone started to laugh. "Thats nice of you to say but I love my job, very much."

"I really need to stop saying these things out loud." I groaned.

Her smile was quick and friendly. "How about we get to the reason your here, Stephanie."

"Ok, but can you tell me who you are and where here is? And can one of you guys get Lester? I didn't think he'd act like that."

"Sure Bombshell. And don't worry about it. He's just been a little out of it lately." Thanks Tank, that made me feel _so_ much better, I thought sarcastically as he walked out and shut the door.

"Oh! Where are my manners! I didn't even introduce myself to my own patient! My name is Dr. Cynthia Covey. I'm your new practitioner and ob/gyn. You can call me Cyn or Cynthia if you like." She gave me a small smile and continued. "And as for where here is...you are at the Blanchard Medical Center in Davenport."

"I've never heard of it."

Bobby laughed. "You wouldn't. Its a small, privatized hospital. You come here if you want the best and if you don't want any questions asked. Rangeman is a key sponsor of BMC." At my quizzical look, Bobby continued. "Its a pain to have to fill out reports at the police station over a simple mishap with FTA's."

Just then, the door opened and a sheepish looking Lester walked in followed by Tank. "Well," Cynthia started again, "This does make my job easier to have everyone here. Now I don't have to repeat myself. Lets get down to business shall we? The boys have already filled me in on what happened but I want to hear if from you. Are you up to it?" I nodded. "Good. Do you remember what triggered your fainting spell?"

She goes straight for the kill, doesn't she. "Yes. Um...I was at a meeting-"

"What kind of meeting?" she interrupted.

"It was for...It was about...my fiancés will was being read." I finished quietly.

"Ranger?"

I nodded slowly and Lester came over to his original seat and took my hand again. Taking a deep breath and giving his hand a squeeze, I continued. "After I realized everything he left for me, I kind of freaked out a bit."

"How did you feel when you found out?" she asked, taking out my chart and making a few notes.

"I was worried...surprised...scared. Mostly though, I was heart broken. Having his will read just made all the pain, worry, and sadness come back full force. Pain and sadness for me. Worry for my baby..." A couple tears managed to escape, before I got myself under control.

"I know your in a lot of pain right now, Stephanie. A few years ago I lost my husband Wesley. It still hurts to think of him today, but I know hes always with me. Hes always in my heart."

When I didn't say anything, she went back into doctor mode. "Speaking of your baby, do know how far along you are?"

"About a month or two I think."

"Ok. When was your last menstrual period?" In the corner of my eyes I saw Lester and Tank cringe. Mental eye roll. Men.

"Um...Id have to check my calendar but I think it was the beginning of March. Maybe the tenth?"

"Hmm...Let me see according to Naegele, you are about 7 weeks along which goes along with your estimate. In that case," she flipped to the back of the chart, "your due date, factoring in the leap year, should be December 16th."

Wow. December 16th. My perfect Christmas present.

Apparently the Bobby thought so too. I heard him say, "Baby's first Christmas. I wonder if I can find little baby cuffs and a ..."

"No guns!"

If I didn't know any better, I would think he was truly appalled. "Angel, do you honesty think I would get a baby a gun?"

I didn't even respond. I just kept looking at him.

Sighing in defeat, he tried to compromise. "What about a water gun?" Still I didn't say anything. "Fine! No water gun either. You sure know how to ruin a guys fun, Angel."

When I glanced back at Cynthia she made a few more notes, and closed the chart. Looking back at me she continued like me and Bobby hadn't said anything. "This is perfect. Normally I would schedule the first ultrasound on the seventh week. I can confirm your pregnancy and you get a little peek at whose growing inside you." She glanced around the room and her eyes finally settled on a machine in the corner. "Ah! Tank would you bring the ultrasound machine over here, please." Tank did as she requested and she quickly turned her attention back to me. "Stephanie this is just a regular ultrasound machine. What I'm going to ask you to do is lift up your shirt so I can spread this," she held up some kind of packet, "gel on your stomach. After with the help of this transducer probe," she held up device attached to the machine, "we'll be able to get a nice look of how your baby is doing. Now before we begin do you want the guys in here or would you rather have them wait outside until we're done?"

I looked at their faces. Their understanding of my privacy and their eagerness to see the baby were clear to see. I turned back to Cynthia. "I want..." I corrected myself, "I _need_ them here."

"Are you sure Angel?"

I looked at Bobby, I couldn't help but laugh. He looked like a kid on Christmas Day. . . . December 16th. It seemed so far away but all too soon at the same time. "With out a doubt, guys. Always."

Cynthia, who seemed just as pleased with my answer as the guys did, started to get the ultrasound machine up and running and asked me to lift my shirt up. I did as she asked and revealed my slight bump. It was easily hide able under clothes, but bare it was easy to see.

How long would my stomach be like this? How long til I really start to show? Will I be like Mary Lou, graceful and glowing, or like Valerie, large and demanding? Just remember Valerie's pregnancy make me shiver.

I heard Lester speak into my ear. "Don't worry, you'll still be perfect when you start showing. You'll make an amazing pregnant woman and an even better mother." He kissed me head and sat back in his chair.

I gave him a small smile and was about to say something, but ended up yelping instead when I felt a cold substance land on my stomach.

Everyone, including Cynthia, started to laugh. Great, even laying down I managed to provide the entertainment. After all I was a line item in the entertainment budget ... I ignored the way my heart sped up slightly, and focused back on anything but being entertainment.

Tank gave me a knowing look when he glanced at the monitor. Thankfully though, he let it drop.

"Sorry Steph, I forgot to warn you the gel was a little on the chilly side," Cynthia said after she composed herself.

A little on the chilly side? Yea, and hell was only a little warm.

"Ok. I'm all set if you are Steph. Just tell me when your ready." Cynthia said after a few moments of typing on the keyboard attached to the machine.

I closed my eyes and took a couple deep breaths. Be with me, I prayed to him silently. Be here with me.

I felt a warmth surround me and spread across my heart. I dimly felt myself smile as I opened my eyes and focused back on Cynthia. "I'm ready."

She gave me a small nod and placed the probe in the gel on my stomach and spread it around before settling in one place. She studied the monitor for a few moments – which looked nothing more than a garble of black, gray, and white - then moved the probe to a different part of my stomach.

"This is your first pregnancy, isn't it?" Her voice startled me, making me jump. "Sorry."

"Yea," my voice was shaky and rough, "This is my first pregnancy."

"Hmm. That is interesting." At my concerned look she quickly explained. "I'm sorry. Its just that at your stage, your uterus seems to be quite large. Especially seeing as how this is your first pregnancy. There is nothing wrong with that, its just surprising."

Slightly relieved, I lapsed back into silence as Cynthia continued to move the probe all around my stomach. Again and again, she would move the probe not saying anything. After a few moments her face started to look almost worried and scared. She turned away so I couldn't see her face and continued to check me.

I started to worry, when she turned away. My heart picked up a few notches and my thoughts immediately strayed to the worst seriousness. Was there something wrong with me? With my baby?

After a few tense moments, she carefully stood and looked at me. Her smile was fake and her voice was almost breathless. "I'll be back in a moment. I just want another set of eyes to see you before I say anything." With that she quickly left the room.

All was quiet in the room except for the rapid beating of my heart echoed by the heart rate monitor. Without thinking, I ripped the stupid thing clamped on my finger off and pulled the plug out when the monitor went flat line.

Still no one said anything, but they all gathered closer to me. Lester pulled his chair closer and wrapped both hands tightly around mine. Tank kissed my head and laid his hand on my shoulder. Bobby sat on the edge of the bed by my chest and held my free hand almost as tightly as Lester had my other one.

Minutes passed. No one talked. No one moved.

Finally Cynthia walked in with another female doctor. "Stephanie, this is Dr. Hynes. She'll be taking another look at you." Dr. Hynes made no move to shake my hand, not that I would have relinquished Bobby or Lester's hands to shake hers anyway. She did, however, pull a stool over, sit down and began to probe my stomach.

She was the complete opposite of Cynthia. She was fairly dark skinned, plump – not to be confused with fat – with long black hair pulled back into a ponytail. She had a superior air about her. Immediately I didn't like her.

She moved as fluently as Cynthia but not as gently. She didn't hurt me or anything but it was still uncomfortable.

Eventually she sighed and shut the machine off, apparently coming to the same conclusion, whatever that was, as Cynthia. Dr. Hynes stood up walked over Cynthia and spoke softly, so I wasn't able to hear anything.

However I did hear Cynthia's sad "I thought so." Without glancing back at me she left the room.

Cynthia turned back to me. Her face was full of remorse and regret. She walked over to my bed. Her mouth opened and closed several times before she was able to speak. "Stephanie. I don't know how to tell you this. . . . . . I don't want to tell you this. . . . . . But you need to be prepared just in case." She sighed and blinked a few time, seemingly blinking back tears, before she continued. "From everything you and the guys have told me, and from what I have seen and the results of all the tests I took when you first arrived here, you appear to be pregnant. Your uterus has grow along with your gestational sac, thats where the baby develops. Everything is just as it should be. . . . . . . except for one thing. Your gestational sac appears to be empty. In this case its called a blighted ovum. No apparent fetus has started to develop. Your egg had attached to the uterine wall but the process of cell division never occurred as far as I can see. There appears to be a fertilized egg, but no development afterwards."

There was a moments pause while I digested all this and could talk. "So," I whispered, feeling the tears pool in my eyes and flowing down my face, "Your saying I'm not really pregnant?"

Taking another deep breath, Cynthia answered me. "Its a possibility Stephanie. In some cases though, women who are in your position, they wait a couple of weeks to see if the embryo develops and occasionally they do. Thats what I'm going to suggest you to do. Wait two or three weeks just to be sure. "

"How long have you been an ob/gyn?" I asked.

She look started by my question, but answered anyway. "About 20 years. Steph-"

I cut her off with another question. "How many patients of yours have been in my position?"

Knowing where this was going she put her head down, but answered regardless. "More than I'm comfortable with. Steph-" She tried, but I cut her off again.

"And how many women that waited, had their baby develop and carried out a normal pregnancy?"

"None," she answered looking away.

I nodded numbly. "What happens if it is a blighted ovum?"

She answered but continued to look away. "You could either wait for a natural miscarriage or a D&C could be preformed to remove the tissue surgically."

I simply nodded my head in understanding.

"Angel...Stephanie," Bobby talked for the first time since all this started, "I think you should wait. Even if its a small possibility, its still a possibility."

Again I nodded my head. I heard Cynthia start to say something else, but it tuned her out. I tuned everything out. I stopped everything. I stopped crying. I stopped feeling. I stopped the emotions flowing through me – the anger, the fear, the hurt, and the pain – I retreated into myself. I closed off every part of me and stayed there. Not feeling. Not hearing. Not living.

It was too much. It was just too much...

* * *

A/N: PLEASE DONT HATE ME...lol I promise it all gets better. . . . . to a certain point of course. lol

Chapter 5: Stephanie leaves one world and enters another. . . . . . . . . . . . . :)


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Everyone has there breaking point...Did Stephanie finally reach hers?

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live:**

Chapter 5

It wasn't until the next day that I was released...under certain conditions. Limited movement and no stress to be exact.

Cynthia was reluctant to let me leave at first but Bobby ended up convincing her that he would look after me as well as the rest of the Merry Men and that it would be better if I was surrounded by people I know and love. Numbly I agreed to all of Bobby's rules, repeating them several times to show I was listening, even though I had no idea what I was saying or agreeing to. I just didn't care. I'd say what ever I had to to get out of ... this place. Thats what it was in my mind. A place. Nothing more, nothing less.

The sooner I got out of this place, the sooner I could execute my plan. My plan...it would make everything better. I would be happy. So will everyone else.

I said the right things. I ate what was put in front of me. I acted how I was supposed to. I did what I was asked to do. I was nothing more than a puppet. They knew, too. Everyone knew. That was why Cynthia was so reluctant. She thought I should be monitored. She thought I was about to crack.

She was right.

But that changed nothing. Nothing could change my mind at that point. I wanted to be happy. I deserved to be happy. My life has been harder than most others. All I want is to be happy. Is that too much to ask for?

I didn't think so. Thats why I came up with my plan. Most of my plans blow up, quite literally, in my face. Not this one though. No. Not this one. I would make sure of it.

I have nothing left. Not here anyways. Everything I have is with Ranger. The only reason I kept breathing, kept living, was for our baby. Now I know there is no baby. Now there is no reason. Its too much for me to handle this time. It hurts too much. I just want it all to go away. I just want to be happy. I just want to be with Ranger. . . . . . . . .

When it was time to go, I signed all necessary papers, changed into the clothes Ella had packed before I was brought over to Blanchard Medical Center, and was pushed out in a wheelchair by Tank.

On the drive home, I was in the backseat leaning against Lester, pretending to be sleepy. Everyone ate it up. If only they knew...If only they knew.

I kept my act up asking Lester to carry me, when we finally arrived at Rangeman an hour later. I didn't check the time when we left, or in the car, but it was dusk. Theres no need for time. Not for me anyways. Not any longer. Not where I'm going.

Once again I was brought up to Lester's apartment and tucked into his bed. Lester and Bobby stayed for a while, talking about me quietly. I knew they thought I was sleeping. In the past 24 hours, I perfected my breathing techniques. I steadied my heart, my mind, and my breathing but never slept. Sleep was no longer important to me. Only my happiness was.

After a few minutes, I felt each of them kiss my head, and head out to the living room, and out the door to the apartment. Just to be sure though, I stayed still, just breathing, for another ten or fifteen minutes.

Slowly, when I was sure there was no one else in the apartment, and I was left to sleep alone, I cautiously made my way to the living room.

All my belongings were placed in boxes in Lester's hallway closet. I crept my way to the closet and opened the double doors. Even with all my junk in it, it seemed to be empty. Luckily for me, all the boxed were labeled. Probably Ella's doing. My eyes quickly swept over all the boxed stacked to the ceiling. Ah. There in the top right corner, on the built in shelf, was the box I was looking for.

_Purses. _Turning back into the living room I dragged a chair over to the closet and positioned it so I could reach the box. Climbing on the chair I was barely able to reach the box and it wound up spilling all of its content on the floor. I jumped off the chair and picked my way through all the purses. I went through nearly half of them before I found the right one.

It was a black leather shoulder bag. It was the last one I used. The one that contained my salvation.

I nearly ripped the zipper off with the force I used to open it. Dumping all its contents on the floor, I found what I was looking for. A key. A key fob to be precise.

I could change my mind, right here, right now if I wanted to. I could clean up my mess and actually go to sleep. Its what I should do. But not what I was going to do.

I looked through the peephole to see if anyone was outside in the hallway. With the coast clear, I made sure my finger was on the scrambler button and opened the door a crack. Finding the camera, I aimed the key fob at it and pressed the button. I opened the door further and aimed it at the camera that was hanging at the other end of the hall by the elevator.

With the cameras scrambled, I quickly made my way to the staircase – I didn't want to risk getting stuck in the elevator – and ran up the last flights of stairs and opened the door to the 7th floor. I hadn't even been on the 7th floor, let alone in the apartment since...since I realized what happened.

Knowing I couldn't have much time, I rushed to the door, only stumbling once while trying to open the door. Closing the door behind me, I clicked all the locks closed, knowing I was only buying myself a few seconds.

A few seconds were all I need though.

Making my way to the kitchen I went straight to the cookie jar. My cookie jar.

How long has it been sitting here? How long was I living here for? How long would I have stayed here if he had lived? Would we really have gotten married? Would we have had our happily ever after?

My breathing became shallow, and my heart pounded. Pain surged through my veins.

How long til all the pain went away? At least I could answer my last question.

Soon, I thought as I opened the cookie jar and took out my S&W. Opening the chamber I saw it was full. Certainly not by me but that doesn't matter at this point.

Nothing matters anymore.

I tucked my gun into the back of my pants and made my way to the bedroom. I look in every detail. The new – the pictures, the books, the little personal touches we added – the old – the furniture, the colors, the smell – and everything in between. I recommitted everything to memory.

Finally, I made it to the bedroom. Within a foot of entering the door, my heart shattered and my body shook with the tremors my sobbing caused. I walked to the bed and slowly laid down on Rangers side. I gathered his pillow to my face and breathed in his scent, as faint as it was.

Dimly I heard banging in the background. Looks like I ran out of time.

Turning on my side, I curled up and hugged his pillow tightly to me with my left arm. Breathing deeply, I raised the gun to my temple and cocked it.

_Dear God,_ I prayed, _bring me to__ Ra__nger and let everyone understand and not blame themselves. Let them know it was my choice . . . . . my decision . . . . . . my fault._

The banging on the door increased. I heard voices calling my name. I heard them ask what was happening, if I was ok.

No, but I will be. I know I will be.

With every second that passed, the banging increased and my finger flexed against the trigger.

Finally, as the tears continued to flow, I pulled the trigger and heard a large boom.

Then...my world went black.

* * *

A/N: I know this has been a sad story, but I promise in due time everything works out...but I warn you, not for a long time. For next chapters spoiler, message me.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: I am so, so, so, so, So, SO SORRY!! I feel horrible making you guys wait so long. I wish something major happened to excuse this chapter from being so late, but the truth is I was lost on how to write this. Please find it in your hearts to forgive little Ole' me...Please?

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live:**

Chapter 6

Finally I was free.

It seemed like only seconds had passed and I was flying. To where I don't know. I don't care either. As long as Ranger is there.

_Ranger_...

The blackness started to fade and a brilliant light replaced it. I was surrounded by a wonderful glow. It warmed me, filled me with hope. I could see nothing but the brilliance of the white light around me. In every direction I turned it wrapped around me.

Never wavering. Never dulling.

Which is why I nearly jumped out of my skin when I felt a hand grip mine so fiercely. Startled, I looked down at my hand...only there was no other hand holding it. Once again I looked around but the light was blinding.

Questions started to whirl in my head so fast I had trouble keeping up with myself. Where am I? Did I really do it? Am I free now? Why is it so bright here? And more importantly where is Ranger?

"Why would you do such a thing, Stephanie?" a quiet, even voiced asked.

Gasping, I looked for the owner of the voice but there was nothing and no one to see. "Who are you? Where are you?" Uncertainty lingered in my tone.

"Those are two very good questions, Stephanie," the voice replied back. "Where am I? I am here of course. How could you hear me if I wasn't here? Who am I? Well thats a question you'll have to figure out for yourself."

The voice held no characteristics in it. I couldn't tell if it was male or female, young or old.

"Where is here? And why cant you just tell me who you are?"

"Here...how do I explain this to you? You're in between right now―"

I interrupted it, "Limbo?" I asked.

"No. Not really. Your case is a little different."

"How?"

"Well if you let me explain then you'd know." If voices could sound aggravated, I'm pretty sure they would sound just like that.

"Sorry," I said slightly embarrassed.

"As I was saying...your case is different. Very different. Others, those who are in Limbo, only have their life and those back in the real world to consider. You Stephanie, have more to worry about. Your decision effects everything. Especially me and -"

"You? How does my decision effect you? What decision do I have to make? And who _are_ you?" I interrupted again.

Seconds passed before the voice spoke again. This time I could have sworn it was grinding its teeth. Do voices even _have _teeth? "You are worse than I could have predicted."

"Hey!" I yelled out placing my hands on my hips. "Don't talk about me like that! Did you forget I can _**hear **_you?"

"I know you can hear me. Thats the problem. You hear but you don't _listen_." I gasped at that, but the voice continued on like I didn't make a sound. "You are just as impossible as Papa said you would be."

This time minutes passed before either of us spoke again.

Then we both spoke at the same time.

"Who are you?" I nearly begged.

"Forget I said that." The voice sounded worried.

"Who are you?" I asked again.

"I can't tell you that."

"Why not? Who's your. . . . . . Papa?"

"I can't tell you that."

"Well somebody sure as hell better tell me something! Why am I here? Where is Ranger? I want Ranger! Where is he? I did this for him!" By then I was getting so worked up I started panting for breathe. Why couldn't I breathe right?

"Stephanie, you need to calm down."

"Where is Ranger?! I want Ranger!" I nearly screamed.

"I'm sorry Stephanie, but you cant see him."

"Why not? Where is he?!"

"He...he doesn't want to see you Stephanie. Thats why he sent me."

I fell to my knees and started to shake my head. "NO! Your lying! He loves me! He'll want to see me! I did this for him! I did this so I could be with him!"

Now the voice sounded pissed. "No, Stephanie. You did **not **do _this_ for Ranger! You did this for yourself! You wanted the pain to go away! Thats all you cared about! Just yourself! You didn't consider how your decision would effect everyone else! You knew Ranger would NEVER want you to kill yourself just for him! You KNOW that! And yet you still went through with it! So don't you _dare_ say you did this for Ranger!"

I couldn't listen to this anymore. No. No. NO. NO. NO! Thats not true! Why is this happening to me? Loud, broken sobs started to escape my throat. My tears burned my eyes fighting to escape. Its not true. I started rocking back and forth. I did this for him! I wanted to be with Ranger! I was thinking about Ranger! I _love _him! _I did this for him!_

Ignoring my labored breathing and my broken sobs, the voice continued, "You never think, Stephanie! So many people loved and depended on you! And what did you do?! YOU LEFT THEM! You had NO RIGHT to think about just yourself in this situation! So many people are going to suffer because of your selfishness! They would have helped you with your "pain". If you had just waited! Now who will help _**them**_, Stephanie?! I'm ashamed to call you ―"

Before it could finish the sentence a different, loud voice rang out across the open space. "STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!"

Struggling for breathe I looked around for the owner of that voice. The voice I knew so well.

"Babe."

* * *

A/N: Thanks to all those who are followers of LTL. And especially to those who have been with me since Leaving. You are all amazing and I hope you liked Chapter 6! Please review. . . . . good or bad I don't mind.

Next Chapter: Uh Oh. Who's the voice? Was he/she speaking the truth? What does Ranger have to say? (And that ought to be the last "spiritual" type chapter. Then comes the good Stuff :-) )

Sky


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Chapter 7. . . . . . The voice is revealed, as well as many other things.

I know. I know. I know. I need to work harder on updating regularly. But hey, at least this time I'm not _as _late. Lol

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live:**

Chapter 7

"_Babe."_"Oh God! Ranger!" I struggled to stand up. He was here! Of course he would want to see me! He loves me! Take that stupid voice! I knew it! I knew it! "Ranger I―"

Then he said the one word that could stop me in my tracts. That one word froze my voice. It was no louder than a whisper but it broke my heart. Everything Ranger felt was put into that one single word. I could feel the hurt, betrayal, longing, sadness, and anger. All in that one word.

"Don't."

A sharp pain exploded from my chest. I struggled to take a breathe to ease the pain and clear my mind. It took me a moment to find my voice again.

"Ranger, please." I started to beg. This isn't how its supposed to be. "Please! You know I did this for you! You _have_ to know that! I love you! I just wanted to be with you! I have no reason to be there anymore! You are every reason for me to be here though! You need to see that! Tell me you understand that!"

His voice remained low. "What I understand, is that you gave up."

"No! Thats not true! I didn't give up. There was nothing to give up on―"

"There was everything to give up on." His voice was steadily rising now. "Why, Stephanie? Why couldn't you just trust everyone? They would have taken care of you. They would have helped you! They would have been there for the kids!"

"There are NO kids Ranger!" I yelled out to him. "You were with me at the doctors! You know the truth! I'm not pregnant! I never was!"

"You're right. I do know the truth. I _know _that you _are _pregnant. Unbelievable, undeniably pregnant."

His words brought another pain from deep within me. "No. No! NO!" I cried out. "Stop lying! Why are you doing this to me? I heard my doctor! I _heard _her Ranger! She said I wasn't!"

"You hear Stephanie, but you don't _listen. _She said you _**might **_have a blighted ovum. Why couldn't you just wait a week? God damn it, seven days Stephanie! Why couldn't you trust in the doctor and wait? Why couldn't you trust me to carry you through this?!"

"How can I trust in you? You're dead! " I screamed. Once again I was brought to my knees. Loud, broken sobs where all I could hear. My heart felt like it was in overdrive. I couldn't get a single breath in my lungs. I started pounding on the ground beneath me in anger, frustration, sorrow, and understanding. I hit the ground until my hands were bruised and unable to move. Finally, I just collapsed on the floor.

I don't know how long I laid on the floor with tears streaming down my face. All of a sudden I saw black in the corner of my eye. I stayed where I was and closed my eyes. How long have I wanted to see his face? Now I cant even look at him.

Bvlgari and a scent that is uniquely Ranger assaulted my nose as his quiet steps brought him closer to me. I heard him kneel in front of me. Moments later a small, soft hand touched my tear covered cheek. Startled I opened my eyes to see the perfect, brown eyes I know so well staring intently into mine.

Happy tears flowed from my eyes when I looked at the rest of him. I reached up and covered his hand with mine. My voice was low and cracking. "You look...exactly like...your father."

Right in front of me was the most beautiful child I had ever seen. He looked just like Ranger at that age. He was just a couple shades lighter though. Cocoa with milk. A perfect blend of Ranger...and me.

"Whats your name?" I whispered.

"Ricardo. Ricardo Carlos Manoso, Jr. Everyone calls me Ric though." He said just as quietly. He was the voice I heard.

I smiled and nodded my head. "Just making sure."

He lowered his head. He spoke even quieter. "I...I'm sorry I yelled at you."

Slowly I sat up. Using my other hand I cradled his head in my hand and gently brought it back up. I waited until he opened his eyes to speak. "No. You have nothing to apologize for. You were right." I started running my fingers through his long, silky black hair. "I'm the one who should be sorry. And I am. I shouldn't have given up. I didn't know. I really thought you weren't with me. And I can never forgive myself for thinking that."

He shook his head. "Not just me."

I tilted my head. "What do you mean Ric."

He simply just nodded to something over my right shoulder. Slowly I turned my head until I saw what he meant.

I saw Ranger standing a few yards from us. Will there ever be a day when he wont take my breath away? He looks just like I remember. But it wasn't Ranger that Ric was talking about. My eyes lowered to the little body that leaned against him. She was the same size and coloring as Ric. She was tall and slender just like Ric. Her eyes were her fathers except for the color. They matched mine perfectly. And her hair. The poor girl was cursed with a pile of frizzy curls that hung just below her shoulders.

She looked at me with mixed emotions. I could see the doubt, fear, and love shine through her sapphire eyes.

Slowly I put my put my hand out to her. She hesitated but with one look up at her father she flew from him and ran to me. Instead of grabbing my hand she flung her body into mine and wrapped her little arms around my neck.

"Momma! Momma!" She cried into my shoulder.

I gathered Ric into my other side and held both of them with no plan to ever let go. I cried with my baby girl. Even little Ric's body was shaking with dry sobs. I kissed both of them on their heads and started to rock my body to try and calm them.

God. What did I do?

I looked up to see Ranger only a few feet away now. His eyes were red and cloudy as he watched us.

"I'm sorry." I mouthed to him.

"Me too, Babe." His voice floated out to me.

I sat there looking at Ranger and rocking our babies. It took awhile but eventually the tears stopped and their little bodies rested in sleep. Gently I lowered Ric to the ground and then my little girl. Neither of them woke. I kissed both of their cheeks and just looked at them. They were perfect.

I tore my gaze from them to look back at Ranger. He was in the exact same spot. I slowly rose and walked up to him. I stopped a few inches away. Neither of us moved. We just stared into each others eyes. Then, at the same time, we moved and held each other. My cheeks were once again covered in tears. They weren't all mine though.

"I miss holding you." Ranger breathed into my ear.

I buried my face into his chest. "I love you. So much. And I'm so sorry." I started sobbing again. "I'm so sorry."

He held on to me tighter. "Shhh, Querida. Te amo, también. Don't worry. Everything will work out. Te lo prometo."

Slowly my sobs quieted to the occasional hiccup.

"What happens now, Ranger?" I asked when I got my voice back.

I could feel his body tense in my arms. I moved back a little to look at his face. "What?" I asked worriedly.

"You cant have the three of us, Babe. Not now. Not this time." His voice started breaking.

Understanding dawned on me. I pulled away from him in fear and sorrow. "You want me to choose?" My voice was barely audible.

He gave me a sad smile and shook his head. Cradling my face in his hands he said, "No. I already made the choice for you, Babe." I pressed my face further against his hand as a wave of silent tears flowed from my eyes. "They deserve to have a life. I had my chance. Its their turn now." He paused to take a breath. "Give them the life they deserve, Stephanie. Be the amazing mother I know you can be."

"What about you?"

"I'll be with you every step of the way. I not gonna miss one moment. You couldn't get rid of me even if you tried."

"Its not fair, Ranger!" I cried out. "You're supposed to throw him his first baseball and go to her first dance recital! You're supposed to teach him to respect girls and scare away any boy that even looks at her!"

He leaned his forehead against mine. "Tell the guys I'm leaving that to them, Babe."

Ranger kissed me before I could say anything else. It was hard and passionate. All too soon it ended and Ranger was completely pulling away from me.

"You have to go now, Babe."

Numbly I nodded my head. I had to leave. I was the one leaving _him_ now. "Whats gonna happen when I go back."

"I cant tell you that."

"I- I understand. What do I do now?"

Ranger walked back up to me and kissed me softly. When we broke apart he turned me around facing the kids and said, "Just walk straight. I love you, Babe. Don't ever forget that."

I leaned into him once more, taking as much of his strength as I could. "I love you too." I said to him for the last time willing my tears to stop. Slowly I started walking. When I came to the kids still sleeping bodies, I leaned down and kissed them one last time.

Just for now, I had to remind myself.

After a few yards I remembered something I wanted to ask. "Ranger, whats her name?" When I turned back to look at him, he was gone. So were our kids.

I took a deep breath, ignoring the pain in my chest and head, and continued walking straight. With each step my heart pounded faster and my breathing became labored. It was just a few more steps when a blinding pain exploded in my head.

Then, everything went black.

* * *

A/N: So what do you think should be the little girls name? Sadly that will be the last of Ranger in what-ever-kind-of-form-that is. I hope you liked it. Read & Review (Good or Bad) and I'll love you almost as much as Ranger..._Almost_ ;)

Chapter 8: So what really happened that night? Just how much time has passed? And how will the Merry Men react? Are they even by her side anymore?


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Who's standing beside Stephanie? More importantly, who isn't?

I know I should have looked up all the medical procedures and all but truth be told, I was being lazy lol. I'm sure I'll fix it soon but for now it'll just have to make due so don't yell at me if I got it a little wrong P

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live:**

Chapter 8

Slowly I started to become aware of myself. My body felt heavy. I struggled to open my eyes but they refused to cooperate. Then I tried to move the rest of my body. No luck. I couldn't even get my fingers to twitch.

Suddenly I could hear voices.

"When is she gonna wake up?" I know that voice! Oh my God, whats his name! I've heard him talk so many times! How could I forget?

"Id say in the next few hours. All of her tests have improved significantly." This time it was a female who spoke. I think I know her but I'm not sure. "Shes healing quite nicely. Faster than I anticipated."

"Shes a fighter, Doc."

"Seems shes been fighting her whole life, poor girl."

Doc? A doctor? Why do I need a doctor? Did something happen to me? Was I in another accident? Where is Ranger? Why cant I hear Ranger?

_Ranger! Ranger! Is he ok? Did something happen to him too? Ranger?!_

My pulse started racing and I couldn't get enough air into my lungs.

_Help! Someone help!_ I wanted to scream! Whats happening to me? I tried to take a deep breathe but nothing was happening! I couldn't breathe!

Dimly I heard the two people in my room moving around frantically.

"Whats happening to her?!"

"Shes going into v-fib! Get a crash cart in here NOW! "

It felt like cement was being poured over my entire body. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe.

"Code Blue!" was the last thing I heard before everything went blank.

* * *

Ugh. What the hell happened to me? My head felt like a semi-truck ran over it and then backed up over it for fun. With my luck that probably happened, too.

What was that? Was someone calling my name?

"Stephanie? Stephanie, this is Dr. Covey. You're back at Blanchard Medical Center. I need you to open your eyes for me ok?"

Blanchard...Medical...Center? I- I've been here before?

"Stephanie? I know you can hear me. I know its gonna be hard but I need you to try and open your eyes."

Why is this so deja vu? That doesn't matter right now though. I need to focus on opening my eyes. It took a while but my eyelids started to flutter and the bright light hurt my eyes.

"Ugh." I know I groaned out load this time.

"Lester dim the lights for her." Lester? _It sounds so familiar._ "There. Now its dark enough. Come on Stephanie try and open your eyes again."

Again I struggled to open my eyes. I got them opened a slit, expecting to see the normal white of a hospital room. Opening my eyes fully I took in the room around me. It looked like I was in the middle of a sunset. The colors on the wall – red, orange, yellow, pink - flowed seamlessly together. It felt like I was looking up at the sky with Ranger again.

_Ranger._

All of a sudden everything came back to me and images flashed across my eyes like a slide show.

_Ranger left on a mission. He didn't come home alive. There was a funeral. I was on the ground crying. I was in Tanks arms at Rangeman. He was smiling and had tears in his eyes. I was sitting in a car with Lester holding my face telling me to take deep breathes. Bobby and Tank were just behind him looking worried. We were in a conference room. Rangers will was read. Stocks. Bonds. Rangeman LLC. A house. A box._

I felt my body jerk back against the onslaught of memories that wouldn't stop.

_Waking up in a room with clouds on the walls. Dr. Covey. She gave me an ultrasound. Large uterus. Possible blighted ovum. Going back to Rangeman. Lester's apartment. Going through boxes of my things. Getting the key fob. Rangers apartment. Cookie jar. Laying on the side of the bed. There was pounding on the door. I raised the gun. My hands were shaking. They pounded harder. I pulled the trigger. Then..._

A voice. Ranger. Ric. My little girl. My head exploded in pain.

I could feel hot tears run down my face. Slowly I lifted my left hand to my head. It was bandaged.

"I really did it?" I whispered.

"Yeah— " A voice off to my left started to answer but my eyes shot down to my stomach. My stomach looked like a melon. How long was I out for? I know its twins, but jeez. I could feel my face break out into a smile at the thought. Twins. A little boy and a little girl.

"How are they?" I asked finally looking at the two people in the room. On my right were Lester and Dr. Covey.

Dr. Covey was standing like she was ready for the cover of some medical magazine. Lester just looked horrible. He was sitting slouched in a chair. Dark circles were under his eyes. His eyes were downcast and not as bright as they used to be. He was about 11 hours past a five o'clock shadow. Right now I think I might just look better than him.

When he gave a short laugh I snapped out of my musings.

I focused on Dr. Covey. "How are they Cynthia? Are they healthy? I didn't...I didn't hurt them did I?" I could feel my heart racing at the thought.

She looked surprised for a minute but quickly gave me a reassuring smile. "They're fine. You didn't do anything to them."

I slumped back against my bed in relief. They were ok. Thank God.

"You on the other hand...now thats a different story." She said a moment later.

I blew out a sigh. "Whats the damage?"

Lester finally broke his silence and answered for Dr. Covey. "A small chunk of your head is missing on the left side and the back of your head...well you cracked that open pretty good there Beautiful."

I turned my head and stared at the ceiling so I didn't have to look into his hurt eyes. "How?"

"You must have been shaking pretty hard. When you," he paused to clear his throat, "when you pulled the trigger you only got the side of your head. The impact though, pushed you off the edge of the bed. You hit your head on the corner of the nightstand."

"The head trauma had you in a coma before you got here." Cynthia continued. "That was 5 weeks ago."

I looked at her in surprise. "Fi-Five weeks?" I stuttered and looked down at my belly again.

She nodded and continued to talk. "This morning you went into v-fib. Your heart started beating too faster and you stopped breathing so we had to shock it back into a normal rhythm. You're fine now and it didn't effect your babies." She went into doctor mode as she talked. She flashed a light in my eyes then checked my ears and throat. "You're 12 weeks along with twins, but it seems you already know that." Her voice was filled with wonder as she tested my reflexed and listened to my breathing. "Did you hear someone talking to you when you were in a coma?"

I shook my head and looked up at Lester. "A little bat told me." His smile was almost as quick and bright as I remembered.

"Well one day I hope I'll be able to hear that story but I need to go check on a few more patients. I'll send a nurse in to finish up here in a few minutes." With a gentle squeeze of my hand and a kind smile, she was out the door.

Lester and I continued to stare at each other. A few moments later he asked the big question.

"Why?" He breathed out on an exhale.

"I wasn't strong enough." He opened his mouth to argue but I held my hand up and told him to stop. "I didn't think I was strong enough. When Ranger died he took my heart with him. Wh- when I figured out I was pregnant I got a little piece of it back. I was going to give our baby the life Ranger would have wanted him to have. A baby wouldn't stop the hurting but it made going on bearable. When Dr. Covey told me that I might not be pregnant, it broke me. I thought I lost the last of Ranger and myself."

I took a deep breathe and wrapped my hands around my round stomach. "I couldn't deal with it, Lester. It was too much. So much worse than just losing Ranger. I did the only thing I could think of to stop the pain. I honestly didn't think I was pregnant. If I though even for a second that I was carrying our twins I would never have done it. I have something to live for. I have my kids. I need them as much as they need me. I'm never going to jeopardize what I have again. I believe now. In everything. I've experienced a lot in my life. Now I get to do it all over again in the eyes of two beautiful children. My children."

"What about us Stephanie? What about Tank, Bobby, Hector and everyone else? What about me? We could have helped you. We would have found a way to ease the pain. Loosing Ranger hurt all of us. He was our brother. Most of the guys think of you like a little sister." Lester dropped his head into his hands. I could see his eyes but I could feel his emotions like they were my own. In a way they are. Sorrow. Grief. Hurt. Relief. "You didn't even stop to think about all the people you were going to hurt. Aren't we still friends? Don't we matter to you anymore? Don't my feeling matter?"

I could see his shoulders starting to tremble some. Seeing him like this made me cry. I did this to him. I hurt him. "_Oh Lester_... of course you guys still matter. Especially you. You're my best friend. You're always there for me when I need you. I knew that you would help me but I didn't want the pain to numb me. I just wanted to escape it. I'm sorry, Lester. I'm so sorry."

I wanted to reach out to him. To take his pain and make it mine. All of it. I sat up slowly, I was still stiff from laying, and stretched my hand out to him. "Lester I—"

Just then the nurse walked in. "Ok, dear. Time for some tests." She looked between the two of us her, her eyes went wide. "I'm sorry! Ill come back in a few minutes."

"No. Thats ok." Lester's words were rushed. "She needs to be checked out. I'll get out of your way." Just as fast as his words were, he was up out of the seat and out the door with out even a backwards glance.

I was staring at the unusual walls again, willing my tears to stop.

"Oh my! I'm so sorry dear. Do you want me to go get him? Whats his name? I'll have him paged, ok?"

I counted to 17 before I could find my voice to answer her. "No. Thats alright. Its not your fault. Its my fault."

I turned my head to finally look at her. She was in her mid-forties with salt and pepper hair, a few wrinkles that came with laughing and smiling not with old age. She was slender and looked just a couple inches shorter than me.

As she started walking up to me, she began wringing her hands. "Well, if you're sure Ms. Plum."

I tried to smile but I think it came out more of a grimace. "Please call me Steph."

"Alright Steph. Well I'm Nurse Jackie. I'll be looking after you in the day time." Her smile was quick and warm. "It seems you've had quite an afternoon. Why don't you take a little nap? You must be really quite tired, dear."

I was going to argue but a sudden wave of exhaustion passed through me. "Now that you mention it Jackie, I am a little tired." My eyelids started to flutter close.

Maybe I'll just take a small nap...

"Don't you worry about a thing, dear. By the time you wake up, I'll be all done in here. You're in good hands. I'll look after you and the little angels while you rest."

Angels. They certainly were.

As I started to drift away I thought of Lester. I hope he's alright. I didn't want to hurt anyone.

My last thought though, was how he was the only one who was here when I woke up...

* * *

A/N: Hmm not really eventful but I needed it to transition into Chapter 9. Love it? Hate it? Please review.

Thanks for Reading!  
Sky


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: I'm Late! I'm Late, I'm Late, I'm Late! I feel like the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland. Lol. Sorry for the wait (again) everyone. I was really depressed when I saw how many months ago I started LTL and realized I'm only on Chapter Nine. Normally I'd have a little blurb about what's going on in the chapter or what not, but I feel it is more important for me to say something else.

Thank You! Thank you to every person who has read Learning to Live, especially those who have been there since the beginning. I am dedicating this Chapter to those who have stuck with me for this long, especially the absolutely wonderful (and pushy) Kathy. I have been nothing but a pain in your butt since I started this because of my infrequent posting. Regardless of that you've pushed me along and continually remind me of why I write in the first place. . . . . . For you guys. I know all the ideas running through my head, at least I hope I do, so there is no need for me to write it out except for all of you. To make one person feel some kind of emotion – happiness/smile, sorrow/cry, affection/laugh – from my writing is the world to me. So thank you. All of you. You're the best a wanna be writer like me can hope to have read these stories.

Enough of my ramblings though. . . . . And on to your feature presentation.

Wait! I forgot. Semi-smuttiness warning.

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
Sky  


* * *

**Learning To Live:******

Chapter 9: Part 1

"Mommy! Mommy!" Hearing that sweet voice call out to me made my heart stop for a second. "Make him stop! Get it away from me! I don't like it! Get away!"

I turned my head in the direction of the cries. I smiled when I saw what was happening. Ric was chasing his sister around in the yard with a couple of worms in his hand.

"Moooooommy!" She cried out again.

I sighed and tried to wipe the smile off my face. I put down the book I was reading, Rachel Ray's 30 Minute Meals, and walked off the porch towards them.

"Freeze!" I shouted when I was only a few feet away from them. Immediately they both stopped in their tracks. They'd be perfect statues if their heavy breathing from running around didn't give them away.

"Ric! What have I told you about chasing your sister around like that?" I could see his lips twitch but he stayed still and didn't say a word. I rolled my eyes and set my blank face so they couldn't see how bad I wanted to smile. "Unfreeze!" I called out.

My little girl ran up to me and tackled me to the ground. I fell with an oof and started to laugh. She scrambled onto my stomach and pointed to Ric who was inching closer and closer to the both of us. "Mommy! Mommy! Make him stop! I don't want worm cooties!"

Just as I was about to tell Ric to drop them, a loud voice boomed across the yard. "Worm cooties? We want worm cooties!"

The three of us turned toward the voice and I smiled at what we saw. Lester and Bobby had huge smiles and were standing right behind Tank on the porch. They must have just gotten off of work because they still had their Rangeman gear on.

Ric shouted, "You can't have any! These cooties are for Angelina," he pointed at his sister, "not you!"

_Angelina. . . . . . _

I saw Tanks eyes narrow slightly. He lifted his right leg, bend it at the knee and put it back down a half a foot from where it was before. My little girl gasped when he did the same to his left leg. "Oh no! Ric run! Run Ric! He's turning into Uncle Hulk!" She could barely get all that out before she started giggling.

Ric was frozen for a second but then he dropped the worms and started running. Tank gave him a few seconds before he ran after him.

I saw Bobby creep up behind Angel. She screamed when she was lifted into the air. "Help! Help! Uncle Les! Help me!" Lester pretended he could hear and started to whistle. She gave him a glare that made me proud when she realized Lester wasn't going to help. Trying to save herself, Angel began to beat on Bobby's back. He probably didn't even feel it. I started laughing when I saw her face as he pretended to drop her. I was laughing so hard I could feel tears in my eyes.

A shadow suddenly fell over me and my laughter quickly stopped. I opened my eyes to see Lester standing over me with a shit-eating grin on his face. I narrowed my eyes when I saw the sparkle in his eyes.

"Don't you dar-" I started to say, but Lester was already on top of me with his legs outside of mine, pinning me to the ground.

"Now Beautiful, I don't think it's fair that everyone else gets to have fun but not us." I struggled to get him off of me but he laughed at my attempts and started tickling my stomach.

"No. No!" I halfheartedly shouted trying to push him off of me faster. "Stop it!" Lester grabbed my hands in one of his and held them down above my head making my shirt ride up to my belly button. I gasped and laughed when his hand danced across my bare skin. This time tears where streaming down my face. I could barely even move under him the way he had me pinned. I kept struggling to get the upper hand but I was laughing so hard I couldn't really do anything.

Then he hit one spot on my side that made my hips buck into him. This time I was gasping was for a different reason.

His eyes turned into dark emeralds and he purposely sought after that spot again. With each buck of my hips, I could feel him growing harder against me. Pretty soon my hips started lifting on their own, grinding him against me, making me whimper with need.

When he knew I wasn't going to fight him anymore, he released my hands. In a second, he reversed our legs so that mine were wrapped around his making him press harder against my center. I moaned low in my throat when his hands made their way under my shirt.

Then in a second, my brain cleared. I sat up so fast he groaned and closed his eyes.

"The kids!" I whispered. "They can't see this!" I said, looking around for them. I started to panic when I couldn't find them anywhere.

"Shh. They're fine." Lester breathed into my ear. "Bobby and Tank took them inside after I tackled you." I shivered when his teeth scraped across my ear.

Breathlessly, I corrected him. "Angelina tackled me. You just jumped on me."

He pushed me back onto the ground. "Same thing, Beautiful. Now where were we? Hmm, I think we were around here," he gently cupped my breasts in his hands and ran his fingers over my nipples, "right, Stephanie?"

My back arched and I whimpered in response. The way he says my name when we're having sex drives me in sane. If I weren't already wet, my panties would be soaked from that alone.

"Please Lester-" I begged but for what I don't know. I wanted him to stop but I never wanted this to end.

I felt him hum in approval before his mouth claimed my neck. "Please what Stephanie?" He said between kissing and licking my neck. "You know I'll do anything for you when you beg. Just tell me what you want."

My head and body were fighting for control.

_The kids! They could still see us through the windows_!My head screamed at me.

_It feels so good though! _My body cried.

I was brought out of my musing when Lester suddenly pinched my nipples hard. I cried out and pushed myself further into his hands.

"Tell me what you want, Stephanie." He sucked on my tender skin, marking me like he has so many other times. "Tell me."

"I-I want," I struggled to get my words out. My voice was low and throaty. "I want you to . . . . to make me-"

"Dinner!" Tanks voice boomed across the yard.

My body jerked at the sound and I could feel a dark blush creep across my face. Lester stiffened over me.

I could hear the smile in Tanks voice. "We want dinner! You got some reeeeal hungry people in here! You two can get cream from the store later."

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. I covered my red face with my hands. This was not happening. This was so not happening. I don't know what I was more upset about. What Tank said or the fact that we can't finish.

Lester groaned and dropped his head against my shoulder. He started mumbling in Spanish. The only word I understood was muerto.

"Please don't kill him in my house. I don't want the kids to see." I said after I dropped my hands.

He lifted his head to meet my eyes. His were still dark with lust but I could see the anger and frustration shining through. "I can only promise to make it to the end of the driveway. Then he's dead."

"Deal." I stuck out my hand to shake on it, but he just pushed it out of the way and leaned down to kiss me. It started off light and slow but quickly became frantic with need. Our tongues raced across each other and in a way that made me dizzy.

Lester started laughing and slowly backed away from my lips leaving a trail of kisses across my jaw and up to my ear. "Breathe, Beautiful."

I took a shaky breath. "How come when you kiss me I forget to breathe but you're not affected?"

I more felt than heard his short laugh. He grabbed one of my hands and pressed it against the front of his jeans. We both moaned. Why did we even stop? "Still think I'm not affected?"

"Mom?" I gasped and whipped my head around and saw Tank sporting a large smile standing on the porch holding one large hand over Ric's face. "Mommy, I'm hungry. And why is Uncle Tank holding his hand over my face?"

"O-one minute Ric. I-I'll gonna start cooking in a minute." I stuttered.

_Please God don't let Tanks hand move. Please God don't let Tanks hand move._ I kept chanting to myself.

I pulled my hand out of Lester's grasp and he let me push him off of me so I could get to my feet. He stayed on his back just staring at the sky.

It was a struggle for me to keep my eyes on his face knowing what was just a few feet down. "Are you coming in anytime soon?" I asked him.

"I'll be in, in a minute. I just need to . . . . . . calm down."

_Don't look down. Don't look down. Don't look down._

"Alright." I turned quickly and ran across the yard to Tank and Ric waiting on the porch. "Let's go in and make some supper, ok?"

"Ok mom. Where's Uncle Les? He was outside with you, wasn't he?"

I shot a quick look of help to Tank. He smiled and guided Ric into the house. "Uncle Les just wants a little more fresh air before he comes inside Little Man, but he'll be in soon." He released his hand from Ric's eyes and gave him a small push into the living room. "Go watch TV with Angel and Bobby while we get things cooking in here."

I sighed in relief when Ric ran out of the room without anymore questions.

Purposely ignoring the look Tank was giving me, I walked to the fridge and took out the chicken I marinated for tonight.

Thankfully Tank didn't say anything about Lester. Instead he asked what was for dinner.

"Chicken wings and drummettes with yellow rice and stir-fried vegetables. If you don't mind can you get the rice going, so I can work on the chicken and vegetables?"

"Sure." He started moving around getting everything together. "It's still hard for me to believe you know how to cook."

I laughed and put the chicken on a couple of baking sheets. "You're telling me. It's nice having Ella around but I didn't want the kids growing up thinking of her as a maid or something. She's just a part of this family to them. That's how I want it to be. I like cooking for them anyways. Besides, it's not like I can make anything fancy." I put the chicken in the oven.

"It still tastes pretty damn good Bombshell. You've definitely come along way. What's on the chicken?"

I smiled when I heard the kids laughing in the other room. Just as I was about to answer Lester walked in. "Something smells good. What's for dinner, Beautiful?"

"Yellow rice, mixed vegetables, and chicken marinated in Italian dressing. I put some hot sauce on some of the chicken for you guys."

Tank and Lester both raised their eyebrows. "Never had chicken like that before but it sounds good."

"The kids love it especially Ric and you know how picky that boy is."

"Yeah," Tank said. "He definitely got his appetite from Ranger."

My heart jumped a bit at his name, but I smiled anyways. "At least my girl knows how to eat!"

"She can out eat you any day. I don't know where she puts it all. She's a twig," Lester said shaking his head.

I grabbed broccoli, corn, cauliflower, onion and snow peas out of the fridge. "Talk while you chop," I said and grabbed a couple cutting boards from under the sink.

It took only a few minutes between the three of us to get all the vegetables washed, cut, and cooking. Another 15 minutes after that, everything was plated and everyone was seated at the table.

"Mommy?" Angelina asked.

"Yes?"

"Can I say Grace before we eat?" Her voice was small like it always was when she was afraid that I would say no

I was a little surprised but I told her it was fine. We all held hands and closed our eyes. "Dear God. Thank you for this food, and my uncles, and my brother, and for Mommy. And thank you for taking care of Daddy in heaven. I wish I could have met him but I'm glad for having so many Uncles to help take care of my family. I don't know what I would do without any of them. Thank you. Amen."

"Amen." Everyone said quietly before the food slowly made its way around the table.

I was struck by what she said. I could feel my eyes clouding over so I excused myself to the bathroom to get myself together. Sometimes she just seems so much like Ranger it hurts. People think children are so unperceptive it's ridiculous. They understand so much, though.

It took a few minutes before I could will my tears away. I splashed some cold water on my face and made my way back to the dining room. I was surprised I didn't hear anyone talking. When I turned the corner into the room, I froze.

Lester's head was at an awkward angle resting on the table.

Tank was lying on the floor.

Bobby was slouched in his seat.

Ric and Angelina were leaning against each other.

Blood was dripping from the table and walls onto the pooling on the floor.

A .38 S&W was lying in the middle of the table.

An earsplitting scream knocked me to my knees. When my throat began to hurt, I realized I was the one screaming.

* * *

I woke up screaming. Tears were soaking my gown. My throat was burning. My heart was about to explode out of my chest. I couldn't catch my breath.

The door to my room opened but before I could see who came in, black dots raced across my eyes and the dark pulled me under once again.

* * *

A/N: I'm breaking Chapter 9 up into two different parts for two reasons. One, it was getting too long. Two, because it was so long and because it's been a while since I updated I figured If I broke it in half and finished the second half and posted it soon you guys wouldn't hate me as much for being so sporadic with my updates. Lol

Oh and a special THANK YOU to Karen for coming up with the name Angelina. In case you didn't figure it out yet, that will be Stephanie's daughter's name. Angelina Elizabeth (my middle name) Manoso. I love that name. I hope you do too.

Oh2 Sorry to the diehard Babes out there, but this does NOT mean Steph and Lester will definitely have a HEA together. I don't know if that will change by the end. You all should know by now, I'm anything but predicable :)

Oh3 and chicken marinated in Italian Dressing………….sooooo freaking amazing. It's easy, quick, and delicious. If you haven't had it yet I HIGHLY recommend making it.

Oh4 Sorry! Lol I promise no more making Stephanie pass out from shock. We are now on the right road to recovery.

Oh5 Next Chapter: Who opened the door? Is it Lester? A different Merry Men? A nurse or a doctor? Or is it someone completely different?

Reviews make me happy. So does Ranger. And Lester. And Tank. And Bobby. And Hector. And Cal. And Hal. And Manny. And Zero. And Binkie. And Woody. Basically any man who looks like sex on legs lol.

Sky


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Yes I'm late. No I don't do this on purpose. And I will get the next chapter in on time. It's not my fault though! Apparently life decided it would be fun to kick my ass for a while. I had a nice leg cast to prove it. It's was a blast to have on . . . . . . . NOT! *rolls eyes* I just got it off this week :) And well. . . . . . . . . . . . . . I am officially a MRS!!!!!!!! :D Hahaha I know that's not an excuse but damn, I love saying it.

Thanks for sticking with me guys :) Love ya!

BTW You might want to go back and re-read at least Chapter 4 for a re-fresh.

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
~Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live:**

Chapter

When I started to come around, I could hear two people trying to talk quietly. Well the woman was, the guy just seemed naturally loud.

"Shouldn't we wake her up?" The guy asked.

She blew out a sigh. "No. We shouldn't. She'll wake up when she's ready."

"Last time it was weeks before she opened her eyes, though." His voice was a lot softer this time.

It was a struggle for me to keep my eyes closed when I realized who the guy was, but I wanted to see where this would go. Just hearing his voice made my eyes water.

_It was a dream. You know it was just a dream. It wasn't real. He's not dead. They're not dead. _Still my fingers twitch towards my stomach. I had to reassure myself that they were still with me. That I really was pregnant.

Her heels clicked against the tiled floor. I guess she walked over to him. "Don't worry about her so much. She's a fighter remember?"

I could feel anger roll off of him at her words. "If she was a fighter she wouldn't be in here, would she?"

It was a few moments before either one of them spoke. "You know," she started, "what she did was wrong. I think suicide is wrong no matter what, but. . . . . . but I could see were she's coming from. When Wesley died I- well let's just say I know why she would attempt that. Ranger was ripped out of her life and when I told her about the babies. . . . . it was just too much."

"You know it's not your fault. You couldn't have known what she was planning."

"I could say the same thing for you."

"I," there was a pause in his words, "I promised Ranger I would always take care of her. Look at her Cynthia! She's in a fucking hospital missing a part of her skull. She's pregnant for chrissake, with twins, and she nearly shot her head off! I promised if anything ever happened to him I'd take care of her. Keep her safe." His voice started to break. "I failed. I failed him. I failed her. I failed everyone."

"No." My voice came out low and strained. Both heads shot up when I spoke. Dr. Covey stood next to his chair with her hand on his shoulder. She looked like she was fighting back tears. There he was just slouching in the chair, fingers gripping the chairs arms.

I tried to clear my throat and tried again. "It's not your fault, Tank. I did this. Not you. I-" I paused to take a deep breath. "I didn't think I could do it without him.

I didn't realize I was crying until Tank brushed my cheek with his finger.

His voice was still low when he said, "I should have known, Bombshell. I should have stopped you."

My lips tugged into a small smile. "When have you ever been able to stop me when I had a plan. No matter how dumb it was."

His laugh made me smile more.

"I guess you're right." I know he didn't mean it, but I could see we were ok now. We were going to be anyways.

"I hate to interrupt guys," Cynthia broke in, "but Stephanie is still in a hospital, and I am still her Doctor."

I sighed. You did this to yourself Steph. Good going. I mentally rolled my eyes.

"Ok Doc. Let's do this."

Tank just looked at me. Cynthia just smiled a little.

"So. . . . what's on the agenda for today anyways?"

Cynthia explained as she walked over to me. "We need to run a couple tests, make sure everything is ok inside your head first." I thought I heard Tank snort but I ignored him. Then we need to get you up and walking around at least. Moving is going to be a little stiff for you from being in bed for weeks. And after that we need to get you on some real food. You are eating for three after all."

She checked my heart, my lungs, and my blood pressure before bringing over the ultrasound machine.

"I checked on the babies after umm. . . . this morning and they were fine. I thought you might like to see for yourself though."

My breath caught in my throat. "Please," was all I could manage.

"Is it ok if I stay?" Tank asked.

I still couldn't talk so I just reached out my hand for his. Tank stood up and took my hand in his and stood beside me as Cynthia set everything up.

I barely even flinched when the cold jelly hit my bare flesh. I was too focused on my round belly. This was the first time I actually got to see it. Just a couple inches under my skin were my babies. Ranger's babies.

I watched the screen come to life just after she started to probe my stomach with the wand thing. Seconds later their picture flashed on the monitor.

Cynthia pushed the monitor closer as she started to point and explain what on the screen but I wasn't paying attention. I knew what was on the screen. To the left was Ric. His tiny peanut shape was just slightly higher than his sisters. He was protecting her even inside me. She was a hair smaller than him but amazing nonetheless.

I was still staring at the screen in amazement when it flickered black. I looked up at Cynthia in surprise. She just smiled and handed me a couple printouts of the screen.

"They are right on target Steph. Growing just fine. Let's hope that keeps up." I just nodded before she continued. "In a couple of minutes I'll send in a nurse to take you for your scans. It shouldn't take that long. After that we'll play it by how you're feeling, ok?"

She patted my knee and told me to take it easy before leaving to check the rest of her patients.

I sat the with Tanks hand gripping one of mine, as I gripped the photos in the other.

"You're gonna be a mom." I could hear the smile in his voice.

I smiled back up at him. "And you're gonna be an uncle." His grin got even wider. "It's so hard to believe. I never thought I would want to be a mother. But now, I can't imagine not having them in my life. I know it's gonna be hard but will you and the rest of the guys, I know I can do it. I should start reading some parenting books soon. I need to find a house too. I can't raise them up on the fifth floor can I? And I'll need to buy furniture. Cribs, changers, clothes. Lots of clothes. And diapers. There will probably be a room devoted to just diapers huh?" I couldn't help but wrinkle my nose at the thought. "I'll need to find a better car too. Car seats! I'll definitely need those. A stroller. There is so much to do."

Tank put his hand over my mouth. "Stop rambling. You're going to be a great mother. Stop worrying about the details. There are months before the rug rats are born so relax. We'll get everything done ok?"

I tried to speak but he wouldn't remove his hand. I rolled my eyes and nodded my head.

Slowly he removed his hand and I couldn't help but laugh. I thought things were going to be awkward between us. Guess not.

And then I remembered. "Tank?"

"Yea, Bombshell?"

"Where are all the guys? I saw Lester yesterday but that's it. Are they really that mad at me?"

He pulled the chair over to sit closer as he explained. "Yes and no. The guys are mad at what you did but they would be here if they could. We've been having a few problems with some accounts lately. Usually Ranger," he looked at me carefully to see how I would react – my heart skipped a beat but I kept my face blank – before continuing, "took care of most of those kind of problems and he did nearly all the paperwork. With him gone and everyone busy doing their normal jobs, it's hard to get everything done. I've called in some contract workers but it just doesn't seem to be enough."

"What's the matter with the accounts?"

Tank sighed and rubbed his face for a minute before answering. "Some people are worried about our performance capabilities without Ranger. And a lot of the clients think that. . . the new management. . . doesn't have the qualifications to run Rangeman correctly."

"New management? When did Rangeman get new management? Who is it?" I wasn't following Tank at all. Why would they hire new management?

"You," was all he said.

Me? What the hell did I have to do with it? Hell I've been in a coma for a month how could I poss. . . .

Oh.

Shit.

"Yea, Steph." He must have seen the recognition on my face.

My voice was softer than a whisper. "The will." Tank nodded. "I'm the new management. I own Rangeman." He nodded again. "I don't know how to run a company Tank. I don't think I could do it."

"Ranger thought you could."

He did. Ranger always told me my instincts would benefit the company. I always just laughed it off saying he just wanted less paperwork to do.

"It's up to you of course, but all the guys know you'd be great. They all believe in you even if you don't believe in yourself. Just give it a try. I'll be there to help you out."

"I don't know Tank. Let me think about it for a bit ok?"

He smiled a little and placed his hand on my belly. "Ok. I know you have other things to worry about."

Just then Nurse Jackie came in the room.

"Hello Dear. I hope I'm not interrupting but it's time for your tests."

Tank rose and kissed my forehead before starting to leave. "It's not a problem Ma'am. I have to get back to work anyways. Take care of her will you? I don't think I can handle something else happening right now." Jackie nodded and Tank smiled. "Either me or one of the guys will be back to check on you later Bombshell."

Just as he was about to walk out the door I remembered the pictures in my hand.

"Tank wait!" When he turned back around I held out the pictures. "Can you make copies and pass them out to the guys please? If you think they mind want them that is." I started fidgeting near the end. What if they don't want them?

Tank walked back with a big grin and took the pictures. "They'll appreciate it Steph. They still love you. Stop worrying."

I grinned back. "I'll try. Later Big Guy."

"Later Bombshell."

As Jackie got me ready she talked about Tank. "It's about time that man got some color back on his face. For such a dark skinned boy, he sure did look awfully pale these last couple weeks."

"Has he been here a lot?"

"Oh yes dear. Him and a bunch of others. They all came in and talked to you. I thought that was sweet of them. I hear them talking about how busy they were now, but they just wanted to make sure you were ok. Especially that fellow that was in your room yesterday." I could tell that she was still upset for interrupting me and Lester, but before I could say anything she went on. "Oh I hope you don't mind that I was listening. I was just curious is all. So many men coming and going out of your room makes a girl wonder." Jackie gave me a small smile. "Back in my younger days, I had quite a few fellows after me too. It was a while before I settled down though." She was mid-sigh when she gasped. "I'm rambling aren't I? Oh dear, I'm sorry. I did this before but you were sleeping so I didn't think it would bother you. I'm bothering you now aren't I? Oh dear. I'm so sorry. I'll stop."

An orderly had just dropped off a wheelchair when she finished.

I couldn't help but laugh when she was done. I quickly explained before she thought I was laughing at her. "It ok Jackie. I don't mind. Honestly. We're Jersey girls. We talk a lot." At my wink she started to smile again. "And don't worry about the guys. I listen to them all the time. Most of the time they're just talking about what girls they found at the club the night before." We both rolled our eyes at that.

"Well then, I'm glad I guess. But I think we spent enough time done in this room. Let's get you done to your tests so we can get you moving again and get some lunch for those precious little angles and their momma."

"Sounds like a plan, Jackie."

As I was wheeled though the corridors, my mind couldn't help but wander back to Rangeman. Could I really do it? Should I? I went over everything in my head but I still could decide. Not yet anyways.

* * *

A/N: Well what did you think? Good, Bad, Ok? Review and let me know. If I get enough I might just post the next chapter early ;) Otherwise the next chapter will be up Monday.

Does Steph have what it takes to run Rangeman? Will the guys be able to convince her?

Next Chapter: Steph goes home.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Hahaha Bet you're all surprised, huh? Didn't think I would get it in, did ya? : P lol I'm a changed woman. Well that and the fact I had it done a while ago. *laughs* Thanks to everyone who reviewed, glad to have you still with me and to those new to this story, welcome and I hope you enjoy the ride.

C/N: Steph heads back to Rangeman. Who will greet her? Will they all be friendly faces?

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
~Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live: **

Chapter 11

I can't wait to get out of here.

After endless days of tests and regaining muscle strength, I was finally going to be released. I'd still be under constant supervision at Rangeman, but I can't really blame them for that. They say it's to make sure that me and the babies are healthy, but I know in the back of their minds they're wondering if I'll try again.

I have no plans to go down that road anymore. I don't need to. I don't want to either. Not relying on my friends was the worst thing I've ever done. I should have trusted them to help carry me on, just like I should have done for them. I have a second chance now – with them, my babies, with life – and I don't plan on wasting it.

I was dragged out of my musing when the door opened. Bobby and Cynthia walked in with grins. I noticed Cynthia had a clipboard in her hands. Bobby had a hand behind his back and was carrying a duffle bag in the other.

"What are you two so happy about?"

Bobby showed me what he was holding behind his back and I think I may have moaned. They both started laughing when my stomach growled. In his hand was a McDonald's bag. I could smell the fries, nuggets, and chicken sandwich when he shook the bag a couple times.

I reached my hands out for it. "You are a God among men Bobby Brown. Now give me it."

As soon as the bag was in reach, I snatched it out of his hand and nearly tore the bag apart as I started wolfing down the food. It has been too many days since I've had real food in me. The stuff they serve here may be better than at regular hospitals, but Blanchard has nothing when it comes to McDonalds.

Bobby rolled his eyes when I finished off the last of the fries. "Glad you have your appetite back, Angel."

I couldn't help the little grimace that took over my lips. "Hospital food isn't exactly the best food out there, you know."

"Well you won't have to worry about our food any longer. I have your release papers right here." Cynthia held up the clipboard in her hand. "All I need is your signature and you're a free woman till you're next ob/gyn appointment. You may have wolfed down that food now, but from what I hear about your eating habits, you'll need to cut back on the sweets and stuff. Just because you're eating for three doesn't mean you can have three times the amount of donuts, got it? The babies need lots of vitamins and proteins." She handed me a piece of paper. "Pick up your prenatal vitamins on your way out. I also heard you hate exercising," I flinched just from the word, "but some exercises actually help when it's time to deliver the babies. I gave the information to Bobby so if you want to do them, he's more than willing to help. Obviously don't strain yourself, it won't do you or the babies any good if you get sick. If you feel sick in any way that you think isn't normal, tell Bobby and he'll contact me if he thinks there's something wrong. Other than that I think you're all set Steph."

I signed the papers and went to the bathroom to change into the clothes Bobby brought in the duffle bag. I slipped on the black sweat pants and loose red scoop neck shirt wondering if Ella picked them out. I turned sideways in front of the mirror looking at my profile. My bump was less noticeable with the shirt. Smiling, I put my hands on my stomach.

"Hang in there, guys. I'll see you again in just a couple of months." I whispered.

Staring at my reflection again, I couldn't help but notice the little glow I had. My eyes seemed a little brighter, my cheeks had a slight pink to them, and I just looked. . . . _happy_ for a moment.

That faded nearly the second I thought of it. What would I face when I went back to Rangeman? I hope the guys would accept me back, but what if some of them can't forgive me? It's not like I could blame them if they didn't anyways.

What about Rangeman in general? Tank told me it was getting harder and harder for them. I didn't want to see all of Rangers hard work be destroyed. Rangeman would be put in my hands if I would just say the words. If Ranger believed in me, then I should believe in myself, right? Ugh. But I don't know the first thing about running a business let alone a multi-location security corporation!

And the rest of the stuff in the will. The money, the house, the box. There's just so much.

The box terrifies me. What's in there? Will it make me cry? Laugh? Get me mad? Probably all of them. I can't even imagine what Ranger would put in there for me. We never even talked about wills. I never even considered one. Of course he did though. He was always prepared.

My biggest worry though is Lester. . . . I know we need to talk but I don't even know how to begin. I know he likes me. How much I don't really know, but I can't ignore it anymore. I don't want to hurt him. I love Lester. He's always been there for me. We were the best of friends. Could I be more than a friend? Would I let myself?

What about Ranger though? My heart skipped a beat as I thought of him again. It's only been a few months and I'm still as in love with him as I was when he was alive. What would he have to say? I might have been oblivious to how Lester felt about me because I was so focused on Ranger, but did Ranger know?

I shook my head trying to get rid of these thoughts.

Stop thinking about it for now, Steph, I mentally scolded myself. You're going home. You should be excited not worrying about things you can't help right now.

I took a deep breath before turning to leave the bathroom.

Cynthia gave me a friendly hug and her number if I ever needed to talk.

I glared at the wheelchair Bobby pulled in from the hallway. "I can walk. I am _not _sitting in that."

"Hospital procedure," was all he said.

I rolled my eyes. "This isn't exactly a regular hospital. I've been in a bed for weeks. I want to walk. I'm not sitting in it."

He pushed it off to the side. "Fine." I was mentally patting myself on the back when Bobby walked over to me and lifted me carefully in his arms before I even knew what was happening. "Then I'll just have to carry you."

"Bobby!" I screamed. "Put me down!"

"Are you gonna sit in the wheelchair?"

"Ummm, no?"

"Then no." He flashed Cynthia a smile who was trying to hide her laughing with a fake cough. "See you in a few Cyn."

"Bye Bobby. Oh and please don't drop her. I don't want to have to take care of anything else for her except for the delivery, please?"

Bobby rolled his eyes. "I'll see what I can do."

My frustration from not being able to walk quickly disappeared as Bobby started walking though the hospital hallways to the exit. I sunk further into his arms and sighed.

He shifted his arms before saying, "Angel, don't take this the wrong way but you don't weight what you used to. Try not to move too much."

I glared at him and smacked his arm. "I'm pregnant you ass. I'm not that big either! I'm only to get bigger so get used to it."

"Yes ma'am" he winked at me as he opened the door to the Explorer and gently placed me on the seat.

I buckled up as he made his way to the driver's side.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

It was late afternoon when we pulled into the underground garage. My heart was pounding the entire car ride. If Bobby said a word to me during the ride, I didn't hear it. My mind was going over all the different ways this could play out.

We took the elevator to the 5th floor. Bobby had his hand on my lower back. It calmed me a little but my heart still felt like it was going to fly out of my chest. I wouldn't be surprised if people could hear it down the street.

The elevator dinged. We were here. The moment of truth.

The doors slid open to. . . . . . . nothing. No one was in their cubicles. No one was in the break room. No one was hanging around the monitors. Except for two people I didn't know. They must be some of the contract workers Tank was talking about.

I looked at Bobby. "Where is everyone?"

He just shrugged. "I don't know Angel. They should be here. especially since we're all a little behind.

We walked towards the two men at the monitors.

Bobby spoke first. "Where is everyone Riley?"

Riley, the guy to my left, was about 5'10", Caucasian, short spiky hair and really muscular. It looked like his muscles had muscles. I bet he could give Cal a run for his money.

"They're all in Conference Room B, sir." He never took his eyes off the monitors while he spoke. I'm not even sure he blinked.

"Meeting? For what?"

"Confidential, sir. Tank said to tell you to bring Mrs. M. . . . Miss Plum down as soon as you arrive though. He wasn't in a good mood either, sir."

Bobby turned us around and walked back towards the elevator.

I was biting my bottom lip in an effort to stop from crying. Did I do something? Tank was with me the other day and didn't seem mad at me. But why was there a meeting? And why am I supposed be in there?

Maybe. . . . . Maybe they don't want me to try to help Rangeman after all.

Before I could think about it more the elevator doors opened. We walked down the hall and Bobby pushed open the door.

"Welcome Back Bombshell & Peanuts!" Was on a large banner on the back wall. All the guys were standing in front of it with large grins.

I was tugged into the sea of black. I was hugged, kissed on the cheek, patted on the ass, and had my stomach rubbed.

I didn't even know I was crying until Tank, the last one in line, wiped my cheek.

He hugged me for a long minute before releasing me and whispering in my ear, "Welcome home, Bomber."

I smiled and squeezed his hand.

"Thank you. All of you. You don't know how much this means to be. I'm happy to be back. I'm happy to be home."

I was looking around the room when I realized there were two more faces in the back that didn't come up to me. Lester stood in the corner just staring at me. His eyes were soft and kind but I could see his body was tense. I gave him a small smile and he nodded back.

The other face was one I wasn't as familiar with. Dan Beaton, Rangers lawyer, walked up to me when everyone ate and drank at the table stationed against the left wall.

He smiled wide when he got to me. "Hello Stephanie. It's a pleasure to see you again. I heard about what happened, and if you ever need someone to talk to I'd be happy to help in any way I can." He took my hand and kept a firm grip on it. I subtly tried to take my hand back but his grip was too strong. "We still need to meet to finalize the wishes of Mr. Manoso. I understand now is not the best time of course. Is sometime next week good for you?" I nodded my head in hope he'd leave me alone. "Terrific. I'll get my secretary to call you with a day and time."

My hand was starting to hurt. "That would be fine Dan." His eyes turned a little dark when I said his name. I bit my cheek to keep from grimacing. "Do you mind if I get my hand back? I want to get a drink." I wanted to tell him to get his filthy hands away from me but I thought that was safer.

His eyes widened a bit and he smiled. "Of course!" He released me hand slowly. "Sorry about that Stephanie. Please go get a drink. I have a meeting in an hour, so I have to get back to real life. I'll see you next week though?" When I nodded he squeezed my hand once and winked. "I'll be seeing you Steph."

As soon as he was out the door I stretched my hand out and grimaced. I forgot how much he weirded me out.

I shook my head and tried to find Lester but he wasn't in the room anymore.

I stayed and talked to a couple of the guys for a while. It was all small talk, which I was grateful for. I still wasn't ready to deal with the whole owning Rangeman thing quite yet.

After a while though I told Tank I was getting a little tired. He gave me a key to a fifth floor apartment that Ella had done up for me. Tank offered to walk me up but I told him to get back to work. It was his turn to grimace and he reluctantly agreed.

"Back to work guys." Tank boomed out to the room.

I got hugged and kissed again by everyone as they slunk out of the room back to their cubicles.

Tank was the last one and I asked if he knew where Lester went.

"He went up to his apartment. We're rotating days off and today is his day." He gave me a small smile. "Take it easy on him, Steph."

Instead of taking the elevator, I walked up the stairs behind the guys. I was stalling and I knew it but I just needed to think for a minute.

When I opened the stairway door, I paused and took a deep breath before walking straight to Lester's room. I raised my hand to knock but it wouldn't move. I tried again but it wasn't cooperating. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and rubbed my melon of a stomach for comfort.

The next thing I knew my fist was lightly rapping against the door.

A moment later Lester opened the door wearing sweats. His chest was bare and water dripped from his hair on to it, making it sparkle slightly. I struggled to look into his eyes. They were slightly dark. Guarded. He was wondering what I was doing.

"We need to talk, Lester."

He looked slightly surprised that I was making the first move but he nodded and opened the door wider to let me in.

I took another deep breath before walking into his apartment and closing the door behind me.

* * *

A/N: I changed the ending just for Kate *winks and grins*

Hope you all liked it. Reviews make Ranger happy. A happy Ranger won't murder me in my sleep for killing him and attempting to get Steph with Lester. *grin*

Next Chapter: Steph and Lester finally talk it out.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: WooHoo Chapter 12. Happy New Year Everyone! Make your first kiss count ;)

C/N: Steph and Lester talk. . . .

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
~Sky

* * *

**Learning To Live: **

Chapter 12

While Lester went to finish drying off and grab a shirt, I went into the kitchen and got us a couple bottles of water. I had a feeling this might take a while.

I met him in the living room. We sat in silence on opposite ends of the couch for minutes. Neither one of us wanted to be the first to start.

In my head I went through everything I could say, but it all seemed so wrong. All I knew is that I cared for Lester, how much I don't think I wanted to know, and that I don't want to hurt him. And I guess if I'm being honest with myself, I don't want to get hurt either. I've been put through a lot in these past few months and I don't want it to get any worse.

I sighed and tried to say something but Lester beat me to it.

"I don't know where to begin Stephanie. You should know by now that I like you, not just as a friend. I think I've wanted you since the day I met you. I'll admit the first time I looked at you when we stepped out of the car, all I saw was your body. You were the star of many shower fantasies of mine, still are." He gave me a small smile but kept talking. "I thought Ranger was a fool for keeping you around so long. It was obvious you had no idea what you were doing and I just figured that once Ranger got you in bed he would move on. He was never a one woman guy and it bothered me that some white chick from the Burg might change him. He spent less and less time at the office, and more time helping you out."

I tried to interrupt him but he held his hand up and continued. "When he couldn't be there to help you, he sent me. I couldn't believe it. He was wasting my time with an incompetent housewife when I could be doing real work. The second you got in my car and stared talking, I could see how wrong I was about you. You just have this . . . . thing about you that makes people more relaxed. You make people smile, laugh, and feel like they aren't all bad. The way you stood strong even though you had no idea what you were doing was amazing. I started to respect you. Ranger didn't have to ask me to watch you while he was away. I volunteered. It was just a matter of time before my feelings started to change. I didn't think of you as just some white girl anymore. We started as partners when you came here. Then we were friends. I thought I could live with that."

"Why didn't you say anything?" I asked in a small voice.

"You were happy with Ranger. He loved and took care of you. Besides it's not like you would have left him for me." Lester lips twitched. "You didn't notice anyone except Ranger. It would only have made things awkward for us. It was just better that you didn't know."

I thought that over for a minute. Lester was willing to put his feelings aside for me as long as I was happy. Even if that meant I was with another man.

I felt something wet touch my hand. I realized tears were streaking down my face.

How much did it hurt for him to see me with Ranger? To know that I loved Ranger and not him? To know that every night I was in another man's arms. To know that I was completely oblivious to how he felt?

A sob escaped my throat. _Oh God_. I was hurting my best friend for _years _and I didn't even _know_.

My heart lurched and my body started to shake.

Lester swore and closed the distance between us. My body shook harder as he pulled me into his arms, rocking us back and forth. "Shh. Stephanie. Shhh. It's ok. Please don't cry. Shhh."

"Y-you w-w-were hurting ev-everyday and I d-didn't know! I'm s-sorry Lester. I'm s-so sorry." I could barely understand myself as I stuttered to get my words out. I pressed my head into his chest and kept crying as he continued to rock me.

"It's ok Steph. Really. You were happy. That's all I wanted. That's all I want." He whispered into my hair.

His words only made me cry harder. During our friendship I always thought of him as the player he made everyone see. Never once did I see what he was hiding in his heart. His devotion, love and pain went unnoticed.

_And what if you did notice? What then? What would you have done?_I. . . I don't know. I guess we would have been less obvious about it.

_Less obvious? That would have been your big plan? He would still hurt. He'd still know you were only a couple floors away from him sleeping with and loving another man._I know that! But what else could I have done? Lester's my best friend. I should have known he was hurting. I should have done something.

_There was nothing you could do._But. . .

_But nothing. Don't live in the past. Focus on now. _

He held me in his arms until my body stopped shaking and my loud sobs quieted to an occasional hiccup. With one long squeezed, Lester let me go and sat back on the other side of the couch.

The room was quiet except for a clock in the kitchen ticking away every second.

My voice was thick and hoarse when I broke the silence. "I don't know if I can do this Lester."

"I know." His voice was soft. "You don't have to decide anything now. I just had to tell you. I needed you to know, Beautiful."

There was a difference in how he said beautiful. Or maybe I was just listening better. His meaning was clearer.

I tried to smile. "I think I need to go now. I need to think."

Lester nodded and stood up. He held his hand out to me and helped me up. I didn't realize he wasn't following me to the door until he spoke.

"Steph. . . Can I try something?" I turned to see him still by the couch.

"Umm. . . O-ok." It came out more like a question than an answer.

Lester walked closer to me slowly. My heart started pounding faster with every step he took. His eyes flicked towards my mouth. I couldn't help looking at his lips for a moment. Would he. . . kiss me?

_Do you want him to?_

I – I think I d. . . . Before I could finish my thought, Lester was just an inch away from me. He raised his hand and gently pushed a curl behind my ear. For a moment we just looked into each other's eyes. I don't know what he saw in mine but he gave me a small smile before lowering his lips towards mine. Our lips moved together in perfect harmony. We kept a slow tender pace but before long I felt his tongue lightly run over my bottom lip. I opened my mouth to let him in. Our tongues touched and a shiver swept through my body. I could feel his love in the kiss and it brought a new wave of tears to my eyes.

I don't know how long we kissed but my heart gave a small lurch when Lester pulled away. His hands found my waist to keep me in place. He rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes.

Lester's voice was soft but I could hear the truth and passion in it. "I love you Stephanie Michelle Plum. I have for a long time. As long as there is a small chance that one day you will be able to love me back, I will wait for you. Let me love you and I will take care of you till your last breath and help you raise these children like they were my own. If you decide you can't love me I won't bring it up again but I'll still be your friend and make sure you have help with the kids. Think about it Steph. You don't have to decide now, but just think about it." He kissed me softly again before letting me go and opening the door.

I felt my tears flow down my cheeks and soak my shirt as I walked down the hall to my own apartment. I opened the door in a daze and immediately went to the bed. I curled up in a small ball. My cries got louder and my body started to shake.

What was I going to do?

* * *

A/N: Dun Dun Dun. . . . Will Stephanie give Lester a shot? Or is it just not meant to be? Happy Holidays and give me a present by reviewing ;) Thanks for reading!

Next Chapter: Steph gets two surprise gifts. From who? Why?


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

A/N: Sorry for being so late again. I just needed to take care of a few things. Good news is that I have a months worth of chapters done so take a seat, grab a drink, and review for faster updates.

C/N: Surprise, Surprise. Steph gets two gifts. From who and why?

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
~Sky

* * *

Learning To Live:

Chapter 13

I woke up to a light knocking on the door at nine in the morning. My eyes were practically swollen shut, my mouth was dry and I had a major headache. I must have cried myself to sleep sometime last night.

Slowly I sat up and stumbled to the door. "I'm coming." I called out. I could barely understand my own voice. Most people would say they have a frog in their throats. It didn't sound like I had a frog in mine. It was more like a cat. A fat cat. A pregnant fat cat.

When I opened the door, Ella's back was to me as she told Binkie his clothes would be in his room in the afternoon. She had a sweet smile on her face, but when she turned back to me her right hand flew to her mouth when she gasped. "Oh dear! Are you ok?"

_I don't know. _"I'm fine."

She just looked at me. "Don't lie, dear. It's not nice." I opened my mouth to disagree but she pushed the door further open and walked in. "I came by to see if you needed anything. How do you like the room?"

"It's great." It probably was anyways. I never got the chance to look around.

"Good. I was hoping you would like it." She walked into the small kitchen off to the right. "Have you eaten yet dear?"

My hands floated to my stomach. "No, not yet. I'm not that hungry now though."

Ella opened the fridge and started to take out juice, eggs, and fruits. "Nonsense. I'll make you something. You need to keep up your strength. You have two more lives to take care of."

I didn't even bother arguing. First of all she was right. Secondly she's a stubborn little lady.

"Come sit down by me, dear. I want to talk to you." She pulled out a cutting board and started cracking some eggs open in a bowl before mixing them with a little milk.

I took a seat at the bar and watched her hands move fast but precisely.

She looked up at me for a moment, studying my face. "How are you holding up?" I opened my mouth but she gave me a stern look and said, "Don't say fine. Be honest."

I blew out a sigh and pushed some of my hair behind my ear. "I don't know. Saying its hard is an understatement Ella. I miss Ranger every day." My hands started rubbing my stomach lightly and stared at the countertop. "I never thought I would have to live without him. Now he's gone, I'm pregnant with his twins, I don't know how to be a mother, and I'm supposed to run his company now." _Not to mention the whole thing with Lester. _

I didn't realize a few stray tears ran down my face until Ella walked over and wiped them away with her hand. Taking a deep breath I joked, "You'd think I'd be out of tears by now."

"It's a lot to take in, dear." She kissed my forehead and handed me a tissue before going back to cooking. "Now then, tell me about Rangeman."

"What about it?"

Ella gave me a knowing look. "Why are you so worried about running it?"

I sighed before answering her. "I don't know _how _to run it Ella. I have no training, no experience. I don't want to ruin all of Rangers hard work."

"Nonsense. You may not have the training but you have the heart and intuition for it. That's all Ranger had when he opened his first office. He came out of the Rangers with nothing more than a plan in his head. Now look at what he's done. He turned a one floor business into a multi-city corporation. He wouldn't have left all this to you if he didn't think you could do it. Everyone knows you can do it. You're the only one with doubts."

"Can you blame me? I-" Ella cut me off before I could continue.

"Yes I can blame you." She stopped slicing fruit and looked at me. "Did you trust Ranger?"

What kind of question was that? "Of course I did."

"Then trust in his decision about his company."

"I. . . . But. . ." I was at a loss for words. When she put it that way…

Ella gave me a knowing smile and finished cooking while I thought it all over.

Ranger would never put his company in the wrong hands. I knew that. He worked so hard to build it from the ground up. He left it to me for a reason. He trusted me and now I have to trust in myself. Besides it's not like I'm in this alone. I have a whole building of guys who will help me. I need to at least try. For Rangers sake. If anything happens I'm sure Tank could take over.

My stomach nearly jumped out of my throat when a huge plate of scrambled eggs and toast alongside a bowl of freshly sliced fruit was put in front of me. I guess I was hungrier than I thought. Ella had her own plate and we ate in silence. Surprisingly I went right for the fruit bowl and picked it clean. I wanted to shovel it down in me but ate slowly in case my stomach decided to revolt. I got through about half the eggs and finished the toast before I had to stop.

I pushed my chair back and rubbed my round belly happily. "Thank you Ella. That was delicious."

"My pleasure dear." She paused for a second, looking a little nervous. "May I?" She waved her hand towards my belly.

What did she . . .? "Oh! Of course go ahead." I moved my hand as she walked around the bar and gently placed her right hand on my stomach.

"I always wanted to be a mother. Louis and I tried for years. We even tried insemination but the eggs never attached. Then Louis got a job here. I would always drop of his lunch every day. It wasn't long before I sort of adopted all the boys as my own. Especially Ranger. I couldn't have loved him anymore if he was my son. Ranger moved us in and hired me. He helped to fill the void in my heart. Louis feels the same. It was so hard to see him come here alone and work so hard every day. It was hard for Ranger to let go and have fun. Before you came along I can only remember seeing him really smile 4 or 5 times." Ella leaned down and kissed my head before giving my belly a little pat and started to clean up. "Go wash up dear. You could use a nice hot shower. I'll clean up here and then I have some laundry to do."

"A shower sounds perfect." I stood up and walked towards the bathroom. I paused at the door and turned to look back at Ella. "Ella?" I waited until she looked at me. "Thank you. For everything."

She smiled brightly. "You're welcome dear."

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Almost an hour later I stepped out of the shower and got dressed. When I went through my closet I realized I was going to have to go shopping soon. Tight jeans and skirts don't really go well with a pregnant belly. The only thing that fits me is sweatpants and my night shirts.

I wanted to go down and find Tank to see what I can do to help out so I grabbed my key and headed out the door to the elevator. Before I could even push the call button the doors opened. Tank was leaning against the back wall with a big grin.

"Bombshell! Just the pretty, blue eyed, pregnant woman I was looking for." His grin widened when I asked what he was up to. "Nothing bad. Just got a surprise for you is all. Get in."

Tank almost rolled his eyes when I didn't move. He reached forward and gave me a little tug, pulling me into the elevator before the doors closed.

"Actually Tank I was looking for you too. I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Sure thing Bombshell, just as soon as you see your surprise."

I looked at him out of the corner of my eyes. "What kind of surprise is it?"

"It won't be a surprise if I told you now would it Bombshell?"

Just as I was about to ask again the doors slid open to the comm. room and Tank slipped his right hand over my eyes.

"Hey! I like having sight ya know!"

"Stop complaining. Most girls like surprises." He started pushing me gently through the halls.

"Yeah well most of the surprises I get end up with me getting shot at, kidnapped or nearly blown up."

"Damn. How did you know we were gonna blow you up?" Sarcasm was dripping off Tanks voice.

It wasn't long before Tank stopped guiding me. I was turned to the right before Tank moved his hand away. I blinked a few times before I could understand what I saw.

Right in front of my eyes was a door. . . . with a name plate. . . . with _my _name on it.

_**Stephanie Michelle Plum, CEO**_

"Wow." I didn't know what to say.

"Now I know you don't think you can run this company but there's a building full of people behind you who believe in you. Ranger knew you could do this. He wouldn't have left you with Rangeman if you couldn't. I want you to take a few days. Think about it. Try some work. See how you do before you decide."

I was going to tell Tank that I was taking over but before I could even open my mouth he turned the knob and the door swung open.

It was . . . beautiful.

"Go on in Steph."

I stepped in and did a slow turn taking everything in. For once the blinds were drawn up letting sunlight reflect off the polished furniture. A dark cherry wood desk with black edging stood out against the white walls. A matching cabinet was pushed against the left side of the door and a long side table covered with binders, books, and a printer rested against the west wall. To the right of the door were three black file cabinets. On top of the center one was Rangers flag folded neatly inside a wood case with a glass front. All along the walls were pictures of the different Rangeman buildings and of the guys. Some of them were goofing off but a few looked like they were ready to storm some third world country.

I walked behind the desk and took a seat in the large black executive chair. A laptop was in the center of the desk and to the right were in and out boxes. To the left was a phone and just behind it were three framed pictures. The smallest one was a copy of my ultrasound. _My little peanuts._ Next to them was a picture of all the Merry Men with me right in the middle. It was this past Christmas. The last picture almost had me in tears again. My hand shook as I reached out and brought the photo closer. Me and Ranger were facing each other. His left hand was pushing a curl behind my ear and I had a silly grin on my face and Ranger was giving me his half smile. It couldn't have been more than a couple days before we found out he had to leave. I traced his face lightly before putting the frame back where it was.

"If you don't want to be in here I can move you to my office." Tanks voice made me jump. I completely forgot about him.

I thought about what he said before shaking my head. "No. No I don't want to switch. It just feels . . . right being in here." He nodded in approval. I looked around again. "Did you do all this?"

"I came up with the idea but all the guys pitched in. Ella picked out the furniture. She thought you would like the red in the wood."

"I do Tank. It looks incredible. Thank you." I stood up and hugged him.

"You think you can try it out for a while Bombshell?"

I pretended to think it over and looked around the room again. "Definitely," I said with a big smile.

"Good."

Tank was about to leave me to get used to the space but I stopped him at the door. "I was thinking earlier about what you said before. How the other offices are worried about RangeMan being put into my hands."

"That's nothing you need to worry about now Bombshell."

"Yes it is. I don't want there to be anymore doubts. From anyone. I want to have a meeting as soon as possible. Tomorrow if we can. I want all office managers here somehow. I don't care if it's in person or if we have to do some kind of conference call."

"We have video conferencing now. Hector flew out to each office and set it up a couple months ago. It hasn't been used yet to connect all the offices but I'm sure we can work it out."

I nodded my head. "That's great. I'd like everyone to be able to see me so they know how serious I am."

"I'll call everyone now and set it up." I stopped him before he left again.

"Tank can I have the files of the managers? I want to know who I'm dealing with."

The corner of his lips twitched. "They'll be on your desk within the hour. Anything else, Boss?"

I rolled my eyes. "No. You're dismissed."

He saluted me as he spoke. "Ma'am, yes ma'am!" Tank winked at me before leaving.

Wow.

My heart was pounding the entire time. It felt like I was rushing this meeting but if I didn't do it soon I was going to lose the courage. Let's just hope I don't embarrass myself tomorrow.

Before I could run out the door and tell Tank to forget the meeting the phone buzzed. My eyebrows rose when I saw it as Tanks extension. I picked up the phone but before I could even say anything he was talking.

"Good call Bombshell." Then all I heard was the dial tone.

I sat in the chair with a smile. First point: Stephanie. So far so good. Now I just need to keep making good decisions for the rest of my life. No problem there.

Mental eye roll.

The inbox was empty so I started looking through the desk drawers. There was one large drawer on the left, one skinny drawer in the center, and two medium drawers on the right. Pens, highlighters, post-its and the usual where in the center. The left side contained printer paper, folders, and a rolodex. The top right side was just a bunch of regular office supplies. When I opened the last drawer I think I started to drool. Reeses, Snickers, Butterfingers, Kit-Kats and Tastycakes galore. You name it, it was in there.

I sighed a little and went to pull out a Snickers but ended up gasping and sucking my index finger into my mouth when something pricked it making it bleed. Using my other hand I pulled the drawer out as far as it would go. There was a single red rose in the drawer, half covered by the candy. In the back was a white card. Carefully I pulled the rose and the card out. My whole body shivered when I touched them.

_I'll be waiting for the right time._The words were typed on.

It had to be Lester.

But why would he type it and not put his name on it?

* * *

A/N: Well what do you think of the new office? The meeting? The rose?

Next Chapter: The Meeting.


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

C/N: Who is ok with Stephanie taking charge? More importantly, who isn't?

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
~Sky

* * *

Learning To Live:

Chapter 14

Once again I woke up to Ella's light knocking. She made another light breakfast while we talked about nothing and everything. I had promised that she could take me out shopping later this week for maternity clothes and a few things for the babies.

"It's never too early to start getting ready," Ella said as she loaded the dishwasher.

I couldn't argue with that and really didn't want to. Shopping would be therapeutic right now. Take my mind off things so I can relax while I still can.

Maybe we can go today after the meeting. I'll definitely need some relaxing after that.

Yesterday flew by in the blink of an eye. Like Tank said, he had everyone's files on my desk in less than an hour. I read through each of them three times. On my second read through Tank called me saying the meeting was set for today at 11:00. He said we were going to work our way up to 8 o'clock meetings that they usually had.

Mental eye roll.

After that Tank sent Bobby in to show me the paperwork of it all. We went over payroll, schedules, client contracts, office bills, inventory, current assignments, and workmen's performance checks (it took me a minute to get my mind out of the gutter on that one). You name it, we went over it. I took notes on my laptop as we talked. I know it'll be a while before I get the hang of everything but so far I understand the gist.

Bobby said to just focus on mastering the basics before trying taking over the more elaborate things. Sounds good to me. Slow and steady wins the race, right?

We ended up talking through dinner but when 10 came around I was exhausted and headed to bed.

Now here I am standing in front of my closet hands on my hips trying to find something to wear. Sweats didn't exactly scream professional to most people. I was showered, shaved, and managed to make my hair cooperate today but that meant nothing if I didn't have the right clothes. I blew out a sigh and prayed Ella could work a miracle for me.

I buzzed her on the intercom.

"Yes dear?"

"Ella I have a little problem." My eyes flicked toward the clock, quarter past 10. "Make that a big problem." I explained the situation to her as fast as I could while I stared at the clock trying to make it stop by share will. Surprisingly that didn't work.

"I'll be right down."

No more than a minute later Ella let herself in with an arm full of black garments.

"There's not much we can do about getting you a nice suit right now so we need to be creative. I brought up a few of my cousins dressy pants. She came over a short while ago and decided she was too tired to drag a suitcase down the hall and on the elevator. Emily's just about your height but quite a bit more meat on her bones. The pants might be a tad bit bigger than you need now but a belt will keep them on you for now." As she talked she held the different pants against me a few times before settling on a nice black and grey pinstripe. "This will fit the best. Slip this on while I find a shirt."

I put the pants and they were a little bit big on me but it's easier to add a belt than try to force my other clothes to button. I looped a simple black belt in the pants and looked in the mirror in the corner. Not too bad. It little wide in the legs but since I wouldn't be walking or standing for long no one would notice. I hope not anyways.

Ella came up behind me with a black button down shirt with a small v-neck and ruffles from just under the chest down. "Try this one on, dear. The ruffles might hide the tight fit."

I couldn't get the last two buttons but it was long enough to go past my pants so it didn't really matter. The clothes would work but I felt kind of stupid to be in this situation.

I caught Ella's eyes in the mirror and she smiled lightly. "I know dear but it's the best we can do."

"I know. Guess we'll have to add suits to the shopping list."

"Of course. I'll make sure you have everything you need. For now though why don't you go downstairs to make sure everything is getting set up?"

I hugged and thanked her as I made my way to the door. It was half an hour before it started but I didn't think it was a smart idea to be late to my first meeting especially since I was the one who made it.

I was in front of one of the 3rd floor conference rooms two minutes later.

Hector and Lester were the only ones in the room so far. They were in a corner talking Spanish and adjusting some wires connected to the camera mounted on the wall.

"Hola Jefe," Hector greeted me. He talked to Lester for a few more minutes before leaving the room.

Lester gave me a small smile when he saw the obvious curiosity on my face. "What do you want to know first?"

"Why was he messing with the wires?"

"He was rerouting the signal to transmit off our lines to the other offices for the video conferencing. We'll be able to see them on the projector screen and they'll see us on their computers. Since this is the first time we've done this he wanted to make sure everything was working."

"Good. I'm glad everyone will have the feed. It's not as good as in person but it's better than a phone call." Lester opened his mouth to say something but I cut him off. "Now what did he call me?"

He laughed a little. "I was getting to that. He called you Boss."

Before I could respond Tank and Bobby walked in.

"Morning Angel." Bobby kissed me on my head then patted my stomach. "Morning brats."

Tank nodded and poked my baby bump lightly. "They behaving today?"

"So far so good big guy. They've decided to give me a break from throwing up today."

"You need a break, Angel." Bobby checked his watch. "The guys will be coming down in a few minutes. You have any questions?"

I thought about it for a minute. "No. None that I can think of. I know what I want to say. Lets just hope it comes out how I want it to."

What I really wanted to ask them was if they could hear my heart pounding inside my chest. As the seconds ticked by my hands started to get clammy, my pulse raced and my mind was working over time trying to remember what I planned to say.

Before I knew it the guys started coming in a few at a time talking softly. They took their seats around the long table. As soon as they sat down they stopped talking and kept their backs straight against the chairs.

Hector was the last one to walk in. He pulled down the projector screen and turned toward me saying a few words in Spanish.

Lester leaned in towards me and whispered, "He said that everyone's ready. On your call he'll connect the projector." When I didn't say anything or even move Lester gave me a little nudge. "You can do this Stephanie. No more doubts remember? Especially not from you. Take a deep breath, take your seat and give the go ahead."

I took a deep breath.

I took my seat at the head of the table facing the projector screen.

After a moment of collecting my thoughts and rubbing little circles over my belly to calm me, I nodded to Hector.

He plugged in one wire and flicked a switch.

The screen glowed to life. It was split in three, two boxes in the top half and one large one in the bottom half. I had recognized the three faces on the screen yesterday from their files. They were the same three people who sat across from me when Rangers will was read.

In the top left was Michael Davis Linares. Caucasian. Blonde buzz cut hair. Light blue eyes. 5' 10". 245 pounds. Built like Bobby. 34 years old. Spent the last 3 years as head of the Miami office. Spent 7 years before that working his way up to the top. He was a Navy Seal for 6 years before meeting Ranger.

Samantha Marie Jacobs was next to Michael. 36 years old. Long, straight black hair. Brown eyes. 5' 6". 120 pounds. You could see her toned muscles through her tight Rangeman shirt. Been the Boston manager for 7 years. Worked at the Miami office since she was 17 before being transferred to run the Boston office. . . . And was currently tapping her fingers against her desk.

Mario J. Gonzales was in the bottom of the split screen. Hispanic. Short black hair. Brown eyes. 38 years old. 6 feet. 230 pounds. He clearly worked out but he was nowhere near Cal's level. Atlanta's manager for 6 years. Spent his first 8 years at Rangeman as a field agent before deciding he wanted to try something else.

Samantha was the first to speak as she tapped her fingers. "How long will this go on for? Everyone has _real_ work to do."

The fingers were annoying enough by themselves but as soon as she opened her mouth I instantly hated her. "I'll go on for as long as necessary and not a minute less. I highly suggest you stop tapping your fingers and ditch your attitude. This is a business meeting, not detention. Learn the difference." Huh. Wonder were that came from.

She scowled at me. "You're nothing but a little fuck buddy that got lucky and's on a power trip."

Almost the whole room of guys either stood up or started saying something to her. Michael began agreeing with her which only made the guys yell more.

I told everyone to shut up but they weren't listening. I tried again but this time I yelled out. "Everyone shut up!" All mouths snapped shut and all eyes turned toward me. Lester was going to say something but I didn't let him. "Sit. Down." When no one moved I yelled, "Now!" This was _not _how this was supposed to go. We weren't even 5 minutes in and it was out of control. "I'm going to talk now and everyone is going to keep their mouths shut. _Anyone _that speaks out loses their job." My voice was low and firm. I looked around the room and at the three people on the screen daring someone to talk. When no one did I continued. "Here's the deal. Ranger left the majority shares of Rangeman to _me_. _I _am now in charge. You don't have to like it but you _will_ accept it. You don't have to like me but you _will _respect me. When I talk you shut up. When I ask you a question you answer it. No one will talk behind my back. No one will give me an attitude. No one will question my decisions." I was looking at Miss Bitch the entire time. "If you can't handle that then let me know now so I know who I need to replace." Again no one spoke up so I continued and looked at the other office managers. "Now unless anyone wants to continue to try my patience and seriousness, let's get down to _real _work."

Everything worked out fine after that. We went over figures from this year and compared them to last year. I might not know the specifics yet but I know lower percentiles were a bad thing. Trenton had the worst stats. Since the only thing that changed was me being put in charge, I was going to have to do a lot of damage control. Tank suggested meeting old and current clients to build trust and respect. It was a good idea that I quickly agreed with. Trust wins business. I hope so anyways.

The meeting went on for over an hour. Miss Bitch tried her hardest not to glare at me but slipped a few times. Michael, even though he didn't think I was capable of running Rangeman, proposed a lot of ideas. He might not like me but he had a lot invested in the company. As for Mario, well I didn't know what to make of him. He didn't say a word unless he was reading out the numbers and the entire time he had a blank face plastered on. I could feel his eyes on me but I wasn't getting that creepy 'I want to skin her alive' vibe.

We wrapped up and I agreed to focus on Trenton since it was doing the worst but guaranteed I would be at the other offices within the year. It wasn't until Michael and Samantha disconnected that Mario's face loosened some and a small smile appeared.

"You did good Plum. My cousin left Rangeman in good hands. Sorry for thinking bad of you earlier." My mouth opened but no words came out. "Don't forget to tell the family about the baby."

Then he disconnected.

Hector got up and shut the projector off and all the guys turned and grinned at me.

I got a lot of good jobs, you did good, and even a couple remind me not to piss you off's.

After a few minutes Tank dismissed everyone back to work. Bobby and Lester hung around with Tank.

"You were great, Angel." Bobby kissed my head. He was about to say something else but his pager beeped along with Lester's. They both grimaced and said they'd catch me later.

I sighed and leaned my head back against the chair and closed my eyes.

"What's the matter Bombshell?"

I shook my head slowly. "Nothing. I'm just a little tired and it's hard to believe all that just happened."

"Start getting used to it. You handled everything good though. Especially Sam." I could hear the smile in his voice. "She was just mad because a few years ago she tried to get with Ranger and he completely rejected her. She wanted to be in your shoes."

"She can have my shoes. They're a little tight on me anyways."

"Speaking of tight," his voice trailed off. It was a minute before I sighed and finally looked at Tank waiting for him to finish. "What's with the clothes?" he asked.

I groaned when I remembered how stupid I probably looked. "Long story." I held my hand out to Tank and he lifted me out of the chair and led me out the door. I thought about Mario and what he said. "Hey big guy."

"Yeah?" He turned his head and looked at me.

"Maybe it's time to tell Rangers family."

* * *

A/N: Think Steph did good for her first official meeting? Did she handle Miss Bitch the right way, or would it have been more fun for a thousand mile distance cat fight?

Next chapter: Getting ready for the BatFamily.


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize belong solely to Janet Evanovich. Unfortunately so does all the money. Everyone that you don't recognized, including characters to be named at a later date, are completely made up by me, myself, and I.

C/N: Dinner with the Batfamily! Oh my! Thoughts, thought, and more thoughts.

I hope you like it :)

As Always, Thanks For Reading.  
~Sky

* * *

Learning To Live:  
Chapter 15

I was going out. . .

To dinner . . .

At the Manoso's . . .

To tell them I was pregnant . . .

With Rangers kids. . .

_Shit. _

I know it was my idea but I didn't think it would be tonight! _Stupid Tank. _He jumped at the chance to take me to the Manoso's. The second the words came out of my mouth he pulled his phone out and dialed someone.

"Hola Mama. . . How are you? . . . Don't lie to me. . . We're holding up. . . Mama. . . _Mama_. . . I will but . . . I _will_. . . Mama can I talk for a minute? . . . I'm not giving you an attitude! . . . I'm sorry I raised my voice. . . Yes. . . Sorry. . . It's just that. . . I know Mama. . . But I have someone I want you to meet. . . No Mama. . . She's. . . I know. . . No she isn't. . . I promise you'd be the first to know. . . Dinner tonight? . . . Yes. . . Just the regular guys. . . No she isn't. . . Yes they all know her. . . Ok. . . Ok . . . 6 O'clock. . . Nothing spicy for her. . . Si. . . I'll tell them. . . We'll see you tonight Mama. . . Si. . . Ok . . . Bye Mama."

Tank slipped his phone back into his pocket. He was grinning when he turned to look at me. I didn't know my mouth was open until he gently pushed it shut. It didn't stay shut for long though.

"What the _hell_ was _that_?"

Tanks grin widened. "That was Mama Manoso. You're meeting them tonight at six."

Again he pushed my mouth shut.

"_What_?!" I shrieked.

"Dinner. Tonight. At six." I swear Tank almost rolled his eyes. "You're the one that asked."

"I know! But . . . but. . . _Tonight_! I have no clothes!"

"Ella will buy you some. Besides I was afraid you might back out."

I took a deep breath. Then another one. And a third one.

"Ok." Deep breath. "Fine. I will go talk to Ella now but you _suck_."

Tank grinned. "I bite too, but only if you ask nicely."

Huh. Since I had nothing to say to that, Tank took the stairs to the control room and I rode up to the sixth floor hoping Ella was there.

When I knocked on the apartment door Louis answered and told me she was in the laundry room.

I walked down the hall. The laundry room was the last room on the left. Six washers were lined up against the left wall and two rows of dryers were stacked against the right wall. One long folding table was pushed against the back wall. Ella was currently moving a load of clothes from the last washing machine into the dryers.

"Ella."

She gave a little gasp and turned around. "Stephanie! You startled me! No one comes down here. They're afraid I'll put them to work."

I smiled and apologized. "I have another clothing dilemma. I'm going to meet the Manoso's tonight. You know nothing fits and even if they did I wouldn't know what to wear. Nothing really says I'm sorry that we never met but I loved your son and I'm pregnant with his twins, surprise!" I grimaced at the thought.

After putting the last of the clothes in the dryer Ella touched my left cheek lightly. "Don't worry about a thing dear. Give me a few minutes and we'll see what we can find."

Ella invited me to wait in her apartment but told her I would meet her in the garage. On the way down, I stopped in my apartment to pick up my purse and a light jacket. It was kind of windy outside. Ok honestly I just didn't want people to see the stretched-to-the-max shirt. Just as I was locking the door, Lester walked out of his apartment. My mind immediately went to the rose in my desk but I decided not to bring it up.

He gave me a small grin. "Where are you off to?"

"Ella's taking me out shopping. I need some clothes that fit me better than this," I waved a hand at what I was wearing, "since Tank is taking me to tell Rangers family about me and the twins."

"Yeah he just called and told me. At least you won't be alone. If you ask nicely maybe Bobby will sit between you and Mama." His grin got wider.

"Bobby's going?"

"Yeah." He gave me a strange look. "Bobby, Tank, Hector, and I always go together. When one of us goes to Mamas, everyone goes."

"Why do you keep calling her Mama?" I remembered Tank had called her Mama too.

Lester started laughing. "She won't let us call her anything else. Mrs. Manoso makes her feel old and says that calling her Herminia, her first name, is too formal for her. Hell, half the time her husband calls her Mama."

I started wondering if she was going to ask me to call her Mama. "What's he call her the other times then?"

This time Lester's smile was wide and happy. "Chata." He flicked my nose lightly with his fingers. "It's slang for someone with a small nose. It's used as an endearment."

I tried saying Chata but it came out more like Katha. Lester laughed and I rolled my eyes.

"Hey you mind if I tag along with you ladies? I want to pick up something for the kids."

My head tilted a little. "Kids?"

"Yea all the little Manoso brats. They get loud when they don't have something to do before dinner."

I blinked. "I don't suppose their parents are just dropping them off?"

"Are you kidding? They never miss Mama's dinners. The foods better than sex." Lester thought about that for a minute. "Ok it's just behind sex but not by that much."

So not only am I meeting Rangers parents for the first time to deliver my new, but I was meeting his entire family.

_Great._

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was just after four when Lester, Ella and I drove back into the underground garage. The entire trunk and half the backseat were filled with bags. Only two of the bags belonged to Lester. The rest were stuffed with my new clothes. Les was very patient with me and Ella. I only caught him looking at his watch twice.

Tank met us in the garage to help carry the bags. "Damn Bombshell, why didn't you just buy the store?"

Ella used her free hand to smack his arm. I doubt he even felt it. "Be nice. Being pregnant requires a lot of clothes. Especially since she's having twins. I doubt the clothes she wears this week will fit next week."

Everyone started walking towards the elevators but me. My feet wouldn't move. I looked down at them and burst into tears. Everyone quickly turned and ran back to me.

"Bombshell, what's the matter?" It was like a reflex that Tank did a sweep of the area with his eyes.

"Oh dear!" Ella looked like she was going to cry with me.

"Are you ok, Steph?" Lester put his bags down. He gently lifted my chin up so that he could look into my eyes. "What's wrong, Beautiful?"

I knew Ella was exaggerating but her words bounced around in my head. I already had to buy new clothes. I was going to be a house by the time I gave birth. Who knows how long I was going to even be able to see my feet for.

With my bags left disregarded on the floor, I flung myself into Lester's chest. My arms wrapped around him in a death grip as I continued to cry. He just rocked us slowly back and forth. "Shhh. It's ok Beautiful. Everything will be ok." He waited until I quieted some and pulled back a little to look at my face. "Why are you crying?"

I sniffled and wiped my nose on the handkerchief Tank handed me. My voice cracked as I spoke. "I-I'm g-gonna be f-f-f-fat! I'm already h-huge! I won't be able to fit through a door soon!" Lester bit his lip and gently wiped away the tears that fell down my face. He didn't say anything and he started to turn red. I wasn't sure he was even breathing.

I looked around when the elevator dinged and Hal walked out. Ella had a sympathetic look on her face. When I looked at Tank he turned his back to me. "Umm is everything ok?" He looked around nervously.

Tank answered. "Everything's goo-," before he could even get good out he started laughing. Body shaking, voice booming, bent over at the waist laughing.

Seconds after Tank let go I could feel Lester's body shake in an effort not to laugh. He heard me gasp and he tried to shake his head. "_You assholes!_ This isn't funny!" I fought to get out of his arms but he held me tight to him. "Let me go! Don't touch me!"

"Stephanie," Lester pleaded. "Please. I'm. Sorry." He had to pause after every word so he wouldn't laugh out loud.

"No! You don't know what it feels like! I'm gonna be fat and ugly! No one will want to be near me." More tears started streaming down my face.

His arms pulled me closer. "You're right Steph, I don't know what it feels like. I _do _know you though. You're not gonna be fat. You're not gonna be ugly. There's a big difference between being fat and being pregnant. You've always taking pretty good care of yourself." He paused for a minute. "Well you've always maintained your weight. Now's not gonna be any different. I heard that some exercise helps with the delivery. Besides remember what you ordered at lunch? I nearly had a heart attack when you got a chicken kabob salad. You didn't even smother it in dressing either! Apparently the kids take after Ranger. And to even say that you'll be ugly is just wrong. You could never be ugly. Beautiful is what you are and will always be." My tears slowed as he talked. "Ok?"

I nodded into his chest. "Sorry I cried all over you."

He kissed my forehead. "Don't worry about it. We need to change for dinner anyways."

_Shit. _I forgot about dinner.

I sighed and moved away from Lester, this time he actually let me. I kept my face down as I picked my bags off the floor. "Ella?"

"Yes dear?"

"Could you help me pick out an outfit, please?"

"Of course dear. My pleasure."

I started walking towards the elevator but Lester tugged my jacket and pulled me back a step. He leaned down and whispered in my ear. "You have nothing to be embarrassed about Steph. Being pregnant grants you some emotional times. You have six more months of it so get used to it."

I rolled my eyes but smiled up at him. "Thanks Les." I kissed him lightly on the cheek. My heart gave a pull when he gave me a sad smile. Even when he wants more he's still my best friend. I don't deserve him sometimes.

Ella was waiting in the elevator, holding the doors for me. The guys loaded the bags on. They were gonna take the stairs since they were headed to the control room.

Just as the doors were about to shut, I remembered something. "Hey Tank!" I called out.

He turned and looked back at me. "Yeah?"

I gave him a sweet smile. "You laugh at me like that again and you're fired." I heard Lester and Hal laugh as the door closed.

Ella turned and looked at me. "I like having you around."

We both started laughing.

* * *

A/N: So I was gonna have the dinner in this chapter but I decided a couple laughs would help for the next chapter ;)

Next chapter: The Big Bat Dinner!


	16. Authors Note

Due to a lot of personal reasons I will not be able to continue any of my stories. I apologize to those who have been waiting for updates but I just cant continue at this time. If anyone wants to write in my place feel free to pm me. Again, I'm very sorry.

Thanks for reading my stories.  
~Skylla


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